𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘵𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘭𝘰𝘢𝘵𝘴 ~ 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐨𝐧

Chapter Forty-One

Chapter Forty-One
Pep Rallies Fucking Suck.

a/n: season 4 for ramona is gonna be heavy and dark. and so will the chapters. i want to do a lot with her character , but there will ALWAYS be trigger warnings in the beginning . if any of these will be triggering for you. i have other books that aren't and won't be as dark as these for season 4 <3
tw: brief mentions of self harm , drug use, sexual assault

Ramona sighed, rolling her lips in between her teeth as she pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs in an attempt to comfort herself.

The constant ticking of the clock was beginning to get on her nerves.

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

over and over and over again.

It never ended. It was constant. It filled the room, overtaking the long silences during her sessions. But at least today, she got to skip the pep rally. Pep rallies fucking suck.

After the news broke of the horrors that had gone on under citizen's noses, that Ramona had been involved in it.. and when she found out everything that had happened in the Russian labs.. The men who tortured her, broke her. Took her livelihood from her. When her mother found out that those men had laid their filthy hands on her daughter.. when she saw the bruises, the burn marks, the hand prints. Well.. she wanted to burn Russia to the ground as a whole. Ramona insisted she was overreacting, that the bruises on her neck, her thighs, all the bruises would heal, but her mother insisted that she see a therapist. To talk about her trauma, and to work through it. Not to let it eat away at her, ruin her from the inside out.

At first, Ramona was reluctant. Especially when she saw the clock. Ramona hated that stupid fucking clock. She wanted to peel it off the wall and destroy it. Bash it into a million pieces. Take out all of her anger on it.

Her mom was right, Ramona wasn't the same person anymore. She was different now. More in her head, she thought a lot more, dozed off in class. Paid less and less attention at work. She missed her old self, Ramona wanted nothing more than to be back to that. To making fun of Steve (but making it clear that it was a joke, and that she loved him very much). To sharing rootbeer floats with him, not because she liked them but because he did.

She wanted to get a good nights sleep, something she hadn't had in God knows how long. She always slept better with Steve though.

She'd make him sing her to sleep, promising not to tell anyone.

"You tell anyone about this, and you're dead, got it Garcia?" he would say, and Ramona would laugh, leaning up to kiss him.

"I promise." She'd say, wrapping her leg around his and nuzzling her face into his chest, drifting off to sleep as he sang to her. "Our little secret."

The thought of Steve didn't make her wanna go to therapy any more though, she knew it was probably good for her. But fuck she hated it. She hated being judged and picked apart like- like some fucking mouse in science class!

But then again.. Maybe it wasn't the clock that she hated. Maybe it wasn't the clock that she was angry at. Maybe it was because-

"We broke up." Ramona admitted, breaking the silence as she looked away from the cat clock on the wall and over to the woman dressed in professional attire sitting in the seat across from her. "I-I mean.. not.. we didn't, but.. maybe we did? I-I don't know? we just.. there was a fight."