Nicholas Millanaire, son on of the Count Millanaire of the Spearight kingdom had always been passionate about protecting people. Gifted with a stronger constitution from his childhood, he was convinced God had given him that strength to protect the weak, hence fueling his sense of duty. He was finally given the chance to do what he had dreamed of. Protecting by being a knight. But from the very first week, he realized it was nothing like he had thought. He found all his principles being shattered one after the other and concluded there was no God. God did not exist. He went through the war and they emerged victorious. But forever the sequels of the war, will stay in him and on him. Locking down his heart as he realized there was nothing good about this world, he was brought into a marriage with a seemingly innocent christian girl named Ruhamah. Will this union end up like all the things in his life, or will he find grace in the eyes of the Lord he doesn't believe in anymore? Unedited work in progress. Features biblical quotes.