do u guys wanna see some smut lmfao i've never written any so i probably wouldn't be any good but im down to try if yall want me to.
okay back to the story <3
Maddie's Pov
i really didn't know what to do. like, fuck my mom. fuck you jane. we hate jane. jane, suck my massive shlong. but cliff? can't he see everything i've ever done? i've tried to be the best i could do, with dad gone and all. and it breaks my fucking heart.
i begin to wander around all of the LA area. i didn't know what i was gonna do. i just wanted a clear head space. i was looking out into the street at all the passing cars, and i realized that we're all just living separate lives. but we all feel as if our lives are the only ones that matter. the mom in the blue car? driving her kids home from soccer? she could have just won the lotto. or, she could be trying to tell her kids that their dad lost his job today. and in the red minivan? that guy can be thinking about all of his biggest hopes and dreams. everything that he has left to do on this earth, everywhere he wants to travel and taste and feel. or? he could have just lost hope in his dream that was keeping him going. we never really know how people are living, and that's scary.
i started to wander around some more, i saw the faces of people who would be burned into my subconscious but never really ever know them. all these people were living their life, feeling things just as much and as painful as i was.
i check my pocket. fuck, of course i left my phone in the car. i check my other for my wallet, and thankfully i had a ten and some singles on me. that will at least get me some food and maybe a call to jess to let her know where i'm at.
i wander into this vegan pizza place that makes me immediately think of Billie. i really fucking miss her, but she hasn't reached out. i did leave abruptly, so i could understand if she thought i needed space, but really i just needed to hear her voice.
i walk up to the counter and wait behind a guy whose tall with ginger hair. he's ordering some really vegan gluten free type shit. like billie, i thought.
fuck it, i need a phone to call Jess.
i tap him on the shoulder. "Excuse me, do you think i can borrow your phone?"
holy fucking shit how happy i was to see finny turn around.
"holy fucking shit" i say, and engulf him in a hug. "thank god, i know someone here."
"maddie? what are you doing here kid?" he pulls me away from the hug and looks at me. "are you high?"
i laugh. "i wish. i've been crying, but i'm good now."
"why have you been crying?"
"do you think it's okay if we eat and i'll tell you about it?" i gesture at a table and realize how fucking hungry i really was. "and maybe i can bum a ride?"
he smiles. "yeah kid, i'll buy you some pizza."
so i told him. everything. we sat and ate and we actually talked about everything. about how mom left, how dad isn't home too much, how i've been taking care of Cliff, how I really like Billie and i just wanna talk to her, how his home cooked meal with him and his family was so comforting. i even told him about how i love his music and want to work with him one day.
"wait, we're gonna get to everything you just said, but what do you mean work with me?" he had his eyebrows raised in curiosity.
"oh yeah." i take another sip of my iced tea. "i want to make music. shocker i know. but more importantly i want to help other people make music. besides, i already know how to use a bunch of software, like siballias and logic pro x and pro tools- the whole nine."
"dude, that's sick!" he got really happy, and i saw billie in him. "why haven't you talked to me or billie about this before?"
i shrugged. "i didn't want you to think i'm like... i don't know using you? besides, i want to work with you when i'm sure i'm good enough. i still have a lot to learn. also, billie is way better than me anyways. i just feel like it would be embarrassing if i told her. that's like her thing, but we have an agreement to not talk about it." i sigh. "it's weird. i'm weird."
"yeah, you're the weirdest" i look up to see him smiling like he's the funniest motherfucker on planet earth. "what?! cmon it was too easy maddie!"
it was really easy to talk to him. he was a good listener. it made me almost wish i had an older brother instead of a younger one.
we finish eating and hop in his car. he lends me his phone and i dial jess. (maddie- normal, jess- italic)
"hey, it's me. I'm with finneas."
you fucking bitch! i was worried sick about you! are you okay?
"yeah, now i am. but i'm coming back soon. i hope cliff had the best fucking day of his life because we're outta here tomorrow morning."
yeah try telling him that. him and jane seem really buddy buddy right now. well i suppose she is his mom.
"no, she was his mom. she gave up that right."
a pause.
okay, i know you're still mad, but can we maybe just stay until he's done being a little bitch boy? another day or two?
i scoff. "yeah, where we gonna sleep? we're running low enough on cash as it is. if we keep staying, we're not gonna have enough money to get home."
"i'll spot you" i look to see finneas looking for incoming traffic. "you can stay at the house until you're ready."
my eyes almost bulge out of my head. "are you serious? thank you but no thank you. i could never fin!"
see look a place to sleep that doesn't cost any money.
"shut the fuck up, jess."
"maddie, i want you and your friend and your brother to be safe. besides," he pauses to look at me, "you can stay in bils room."
my heart fluttered at the thought of staying in her room. i knew i couldn't, but it would just smell like her, and i want to be as close to her as possible right now. "fin, i can't. i'm sorry."
"well that sucks, because i'm not taking no for an answer. and if i ask my mom she won't hesitate to make sure you guys are safe. i'll stay with you in my room since i have another meeting in a few days."
say fucking yes, maddie. don't be stupid. i love you but cmon dude.
"i'm not taking no for an answer."
fuck it. "fuck it."
end of chapter
sorry this one is a little shorter i'm just ready to knock out okay love you babies goodnight.
much love,
bigdikrick66
