The Reject Squad || MHA Fanfiction || Discontinued

Chapter 9

Shouta Aizawa was eternally tired. With two vigilantes running around, and a class full of annoying children to supervise, he had no rest.

So when he saw a new cafe that had just opened close to UA, he was quick to go there.

The cafe had a nice calming atmosphere. The employees were chatting with a couple of customers about when their first actual customer would come - which means they must all be friends. The cafe wasn't blinding either. The lights were at the perfect brightness, and the walls were painted with a muted gray-blue color.

He opened the door a bit further and a bell chimed.

"Welcome to the Chaos Cafe! How may I help you?" A woman about 20, he guessed, asked him.

"Not very Chaotic, it's actually kind of nice in here." He mumbled. "I'll just take a black coffee."

He saw the purple haired boy shaking a pink haired girl. "Oh my god! Mei! Eraserhead just said our Cafe was nice! The Eraserhead! Mei!" The boy whispered.

"I know, Hito. Do you think he would want some support gear?" The girl responded in the same hushed tone.

"Here you go!" A green haired boy said, giving him his coffee. "Also - I have a question."

"What is it?" Aizawa sighed.

"Are you and Present Mic married?"

"What!?" Aizawa was shocked.

"Well, are you?"

"Wha- how did you know?"

"Ha! Mei, you owe me $20!"

A/N - I know it's yen in Japan. I'm american and I'm too lazy to look up the exchange rate so you'll have to deal with it

"Dammit" The pink haired girl handed the boy the cash.

Aizawa stared at the young teens.

"Are you looking to adopt?" The green haired boy asked with the most fake innocent face he's ever seen.

"Izu nO!" The purple haired boy asked.

"Hito, you're treated horribly in that orphanage."

"Eraserhead's probably not even looking to adopt! Plus, why would he even want someone like me?"

Aizawa gave a long sigh of suffering.

"I now see why you called it the Chaos Cafe. I'll be going now - have my order ready at the same time tomorrow." And with that he left.

---

"Shoooouta! Why are you late!" The loud obnoxious Hizashi Yamada said.

"You're too loud. And if you must know I was checking out a new cafe." Aizawa said, plopping down on the couch to grade papers.

"Ooh~ is it good?" Yamada asked.

"Yeah I guess." Aizawa said.

Yamada froze. Shouta saying a cafe was good never happened. At best it would be 'its not bad', but never agreeing that it was good.

"Well then, you'll have to take me there!" Yamada said happily.

"Oh - they also guessed me and you were married. Bet on it too."

"Wait - what?"

-----

Aizawa was probably having the worst day ever. Yes, he did find a good cafe, but when he was going on patrol, he was not expecting to find the most problematic vigilantes to ever exist arguing on what the best type of coffee was on top of said cafe at 1 in the morning with one of the employees he saw earlier watching them sipping his drink.

"What is going on here?" He said with the most tired voice to exist.

The greenette just shrugged.

"They apparently visited the cafe earlier, at different times, and when they saw it was still open because we all have insomnia here they ran into each other. They've been arguing for a bit while we prepare their drinks."

"This is quality entertainment. Get my coffee ready."

----

The vigilantes were still arguing when their drinks came up.

"Guys, your drinks are done." Izuku said.

The two blinked. "Oh, thanks."

Izuku handed out three coffees and the lawbreakers had somehow just noticed Eraserhead.

"Ugh... How long has he been here?" Dabi asked.

Izuku shrugged.

"What's he gonna do, aRrEsT me?" Crimson said sarcastically.

Eraserhead activated his quirk.

"Oh no! My qUiRk'S gOnE! wHaTeVeR sHaLL I dO?" Crimson continued.

"The amount of sarcasm you're able to emit is impressive." Izuku commented.

 "Well, I gotta go," Dabi said. "You're the only one immune to the law in this scenario." He jumped away.

"I'm pretty sure being able to not be arrested right now is worth having raised prices at stores." Crimson said.

"...what are you talking about?" Aizawa asked.

The green boi gasped.

"Quirkless buddy!"

"No way? You're quirkless too?" The vigilante said.

The two high fived.

"We're invisible to the law!" Crimson said happily.

"Included discrimination laws!" Green boy said in an equally happy tone.

"And any law that protects our rights!" Crimson continued.

"And we aren't allowed in movie theaters!"

"Or restaurants!"

"Or hospitals!"

"Living the best life as a quirkless person!"

"Are you.... Ok?" Aizawa asked.

"Perfectly!"

"I've only tried to kill myself three times this year!"

"Uh..." Aizawa was now very concerned for the pair of quirkless people on the roof.

"I've only been referred to as 'it' five times today!"

"The store only raised the price by half today!"

"I was only called a 'slut' twice!"

"I only got three scars from bullies today!"

"Stop turning this into a competition-" Aizawa said, hoping they would stop whatever self-deprecation this was.

"I only have five self harm scars today!"

"I only have three!"

Aizawa could at least say he tried.

He left the two to whatever they were doing and headed down to the police station to check up on if half of what they said was true about how they were invisible to laws.

Let's just say he ended up mad at the legal system.