When?

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Chapter 6: When?

Shuhua

We played games! I really didn't expect that they would join me! Especially Miyeon unnie, she never really played and was busy with her schedule. But today is different, she played with me and Minnie unnie despite being tired and all.

I really admire her. I know I would be mean at her but I don't know how to express what I feel sometimes, and it's my fault if ever she misunderstood that I hated her. To be honest, If I were to question myself if I hate her— I wouldn't hate her. She is just such a goddess.



"You know that feeling that you still play even if you are taking a shit?"




I could hear laughs in front of me and I couldn't help but look at them. They look good for each other, I thought.


'Jinjin... I need you'












Fast Forward


She was gone... with nothing left behind for us to know. She disappeared. There was no hope. And I had to give up but I know for sure I will still look for her.

Everything was falling apart. No one knew what to do. But they had to keep things in control in order to reach their dreams together. Miyeon and Minnie Unnie were still close and so is Yuqi and Soyeon.

I always waited for the door to open, waiting incase she came back. But after four years, she was still nowhere to be found. Social Medias trying to make a hashtag for her and still, nothing has changed.


What if she doesn't want to come back home?


"Shuhua? Hey... lets sleep"

I turned around facing Soyeon and smiled "No, I will wait" keeping my self together as I faced the front door not minding how heavy the weight is in my eyes. Body aching as I stayed in the same positions as time passes by.
"I still believe that jinjin will come back"


The room was filled with no noise but only our breathing. I love how the wind gets colder and colder. I sometimes feel empty. She was the only reason why I stayed. Yet she left.



"I miss her too, Shuhua" I felt myself being filled with silence as I heard Soyeon talking. "I can sometimes be harsh but I really miss her. I know she is far away but I know that someday, or maybe other day— she will come back to us" her words made me somehow low. Not knowing what to do, I looked at Soyeon and smiled. I never knew what she felt so I just didn't mind her. No matter how deppressing everything is, I tried and tried.


"I'm Sorry" those words always made me feel angry. It was something Soojin unnie would say whenever she would hurt me but It didn't changed the fact that I love her. She was always on my mind, and her being in my thoughts...it never left my mind. I have always dreamed about us. Though it was never the same thing like before.



If before I was dreaming that she would love me the way that I love her, then today is when I dreamed of her coming back to my arms.





When will I see my moon again?












"I never knew how much it would hurt but now that she left, I feel like I'm not myself like before. Before where she made me the happiest maknae, made me delicious food, made me care for myself. You know, when you meet someone that they made you the person you are today but now she went away like how the sun goes away when the rain comes by" time passes by so quickly that all I remember was being happy before and not today. Soyeon only looked at me sadly like she didn't know what to do with me but that's fine..





'I don't even know what to do to myself as well'








dear diary,
maybe I should move on.






A/N: how r u all..? Hope u guys doin okay.  Its fine to rest sometimes, It might take a while but giving yourself a moment is important too okay?? I am sorry for being inactive haha.

Stay safe everyone<3

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