To Love, Once Again

Chapter 94

"My mother died falling off horseback"

That revelation left Sera gasping. It winded her more than her fall from the tree. The ground itself felt like it had become like jello as she placed a hand on her own stomach to steady herself.

Feeling her body quivering within his embrace, Lucien pulls her closer to support her sways. With his large arms carefully wrapped themselves around her waist, Sera could feel his heart still thudding frantically.

"I'm..I'm sorry." Sera whispered.

That was why he was so protective of her, . WHen a maid, she'd been practically glued to his side after that first day, ignoring his burning looks searing into her skin while she worked. No wonder that first time after they'd chosen each other, he hovered over her with more care than her own mother.

"No need to apologize. It is something I cannot change." His warm breath fanned against her skin with the muffled response.

Indignation at herself creates furrows between her brunette brows. If she'd known, she wouldn't have gone prancing off to farm some honey. If she'd known, she would have tried to be...

To be..

The furrows between her brows dug deeper.

More careful?

"I didn't know.."

Fingers digging into the hard muscles of his back, Sera fiercely hugs Lucien back. She was drowning. Drowning in the knowing of the pain she must have caused Lucien yet again.

You left. You abandoned your husband. You threw away your newborn baby.

Her past screamed at her, opening up its jagged maw trying to drag her into the depths of her despair. Trying to surround her in her shame, the feeling of unworthiness and disappointment in herself overwhelming.

You made Lucien worry again. Like before.

Pain unfurls, stinging into her heart like salt over the old wounds.

"I-"

The soft cloth of Lucien's shirt presses into her cheeks when she burrows deeper into his embrace.

"I'm not doing anything right, am I?" She asks, lips quirking sadly at her own foolishness. Her breath catches on the knot in her throat.

"Sera." Lucien presses a kiss atop her head.

Large hands continued to stroke her back, her waist. A wholly comforting gesture. Now look at yourself Sera. Her broken conscience spoke up once again.

Making him comfort you.

What a good wife you are.

The taste of iron spreading over her tongue registers. She'd accidentally bit her cheek while gritting her teeth.

Soft touches skate up her back, Lucien's fingers gently tilting her face up towards him. Unable to look at him yet, Sera kept her eyes knitted tightly together. She doesn't see the soft smile that invokes in Lucien, the eyes filled with love and tenderness.

Sera only felt the whisper-light touches of a kiss on both eyes, smoothing the tight wrinkles out.

"Sera, please, love. Look at me."

With a slow trepidation, she finally opens her eyes, slightly. With the sun behind Lucien, it was hard for her to figure out his expression.

Soon, all Sera could see was the vast blue sky above her, Lucien leaning down to whisper in her ear.