Dishonor

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Corset tightings, zippers are being zipped and the laughter of children fill the room mixed with the strong scent of hairspray.
"mama I do not wish to do this," I say turning my face to her
"oh but you must my dear child one does not simply decline an invitation to the Palace, especially one sent by the Queen herself"

"Lady whistledowns new article about you is singlehandedly chasing away any suitable suitors"
She says stroking my dark tight curls,
"If you accept  Charles's engagement offer it would do us enormous good".

"It is extremely generous of the queen to look kindly upon you and send an invitation to the blue and white ball despite your last scandal, people will most likely talk but I know you are innocent my child.
It is all simply rumors and that's all it'll ever be".

My heart heavied with guilt thinking about that night at fraya Garden, I couldn't control myself and neither could adien so we decided to share a goodbye kiss, that is until we heard footsteps around the corner and soon enough the news spread like wildfire and I was known as the girl who lost her "virtue" at the fraya garden.

Now mama is practically selling me to the only suitor that will buy, since the other ones pulled back. the right thing to do would be to either get married to adien but he's in the military now so I can forget about that or the royal family's cousin "Charles" whom I could not care any less for, he has quite the reputation and is known for being a rake and I simply will  not subject myself to that kind of suffering.

besides i have no thoughts of marriage
I was going to find a way to get myself out of this, I always did.
be it falling terribly ill, a pregnancy scare, or thoughts of running away I will not spend the rest of my life tied to a man, or in an unhappy marriage.

PLS do vote on the chapters and be sure to let me know your thoughts✨

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