Her Lilac Eyes

Ch.4|Is it my fault?

After we got to the supermarket and had lots of fun,we were putting our groceries in the car. I saw a girl selling some flowers. Something about a blue rose got my attention. I went to the girl,she probably was around 17 years old.

"Hello little fella, do you want a flower for your mommy?" Such a kind smile..I wont forget it,will I?

"I...yes,how much is it?" I wanted to tell her that mom wasn't alive anymore, but I stayed silent. I didn't want her to feel bad for asking me this.

"What flower do you want? The Roses are 3$ and the tulips are 2$."

"I want the blue rose,its beautiful." I pointed to that one flower that mesmerized m.

"You sure? Dont you want a red one?" She tried to give me one but nothing can change my opinion.

"Yes! I want the blue one,its more beautiful."

"Okay little one,the blue rose is it." She handed me the beautiful flower,and I finally hold it in my little hand.

I had 5$ that my grandpa gave me. I gave the girl the money and ran to my dad so that we can go home. I learned that the girl was selling flowers for her brother,he needs the money for medicine,that made me sad,so I gave her the 2$ she was supposed to give me back. I felt happy,Eva was right, the best feeling in the world is helping someone who needs help.

"What you got there Mako,a blue rose?" He was surprised to see a flower in my hand.

"Yes! Its beautiful so I wanted it."

"Oh okay." As he put the groceries in the back I asked him..

"Would you mind if we go to mom,and leave the rose there?"

"Sure. Why not."

After the little talk,we went to mom's grave,and left the rose there. I hope she is happy.
Then we drove back home. Dad apparently had a free day,so we spent it together. After we got home we cooked together, then we played, and after that we took a bath together. So much fun! Then night came,I was watching the stars from the couch.

"Dont you think the stars are beautiful, dad?" I was in love with them..how they shine in the dark sky,so beautiful.

"They are. There is a myth that every soul finds peace there. I dont really belive it. Every good soul goes to heaven, and the bad souls to hell."

"Look the football player score another goal! Yay! They won!" I was jumping from excitement, I like football.

"They won. And you won a ticket to bed time." He smirked at me,softly joking.

"Oh man.. "

I went to my bedroom, he followed me. Strange,he never did this.

"Do you want me to tell you a bed time story?" He looked over to the bookshelf thinking what book can he read me.

"No ,dad. I dont need one."

Liar. I was waiting for another person to tell me a story.
He walked out and I sat there. And waited, and waited. Why isn't she coming? Did something happened to her?
I walked to the window and looked for a certain something.
30 minutes have passed by,and she didn't come. I was worried. What if the night before, when I saw her leave,that was the last time I would see her? That's why she looked so sad at my door?
Eva... where are you? Are you okay?

I have lost my battle with being awake,and went to bed.
I didn't get that much sleep,and I was so tired in the morning.
This continued for days. Then a week passed by. Then two.

I was so worried that I started to get sick. My dad noticed so he contacted the teacher and I stayed at home.
Why wasn't she coming? What did I do? Was it my fault? Did she lost her memory and doesn't know how to come back?
My imagination started to play games with me,I would see the little dusts in the house. Or I would hear her lullabies. What is wrong with me? What did I do? Is it my fault?

I fear that I'm waiting for something that isn't going to happen.