CHAPTER 1

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Namjoon’s POV

“…. since the journey, the road of finding how to love ourselves doesn’t finish here, in the future too, let’s hold hands as we are now, and be together as we work out how to love ourselves…

… In the future, too, I hope that even one word of ours, one line of lyrics, could be a help for you to love yourselves…

… In the future, too, whatever we return with, let’s try to enjoy ourselves together. It’d be good if there was a better word than ‘love,’ but truly, I love you. Please know that."

While I spoke these words to the people who love me, who love BTS intensely— our people, our ARMY —the cascade of tears enveloped me. There was no stop to these emotions. It was time to say goodbye to the people who had always waited for us and supported us.

Today was the last day of our concert in Japan. Our time here harbored beautiful memories. With one of our concerns off our shoulders, my members and I were tired, to say the least. After the successful concert, the fruit of our efforts, we went straight to our hotel.

“Ah, I want to sleep!” Jungkook, our maknae, exclaimed, throwing his legs over the couch where Yoongi-hyung laid in deep sleep. I had always wondered how he could fall asleep anywhere.

Jin hyung was busy snapping pictures of Taehyung, who was gazing at the spectacular view of Japan as we passed by it. Hoseok and Jimin’s chatter served as the perfect background music as I immersed in thought.

Without realizing, we had already reached our destination. The members flung open the doors and rushed to their rooms. I smiled at them.

With every inch of my body aching, I craved a hot bath. Flinging the door open, I was met with a pleasant surprise: the tub, filled with bubbling water and a blue bath bomb. I smiled knowing it was Jin hyung’s doing. Shouting a “Thanks!” across the room, I dived.

****

I was already feeling better after taking a long bath, so I decided to be productive and grabbed the schedule. And just as though the universe read my thoughts, it brought forth an err.

A knock on the door caught all my attention.

Hmm, wonder who that is.

“Oppa!"

At that moment, I knew that if I opened that door, I’d be faced with the literal definition of annoyance, the biggest problem I had to deal with currently.

The bell rang twice. I groaned. “Coming!”

I opened the door and came face to face with a gigantic bouquet, a little too big for my taste.

“Hi, Hanum. What brings you here?” I took the flowers and waited. Of course, she entered the room. There was no stopping her. I let out a sigh; a plea of sorts.

“Oppa! I attended the concert today. You all did so well! Especially you, oppa, you were shining bright like a star! He-he.”

I knew every word before she uttered it. It was a routine at this point. I gave her a tiny smile while I shuddered, the cringe too strong.

“I traveled all this way from Korea to Japan just to see you, oppa. I was missing you so much! Oppa, have you eaten? You look-”

“You shouldn’t have come. It’s getting late. Not very nice of you to loiter around at this hour,” I cut her off. The exhaustion was hitting harder today.

“O-oh, okay, oppa. You should rest… I- uh- I’ll go now!” The door shut behind me. I let out a sigh of relief.

I was aware of Hanum’s crush on me. I had known her since she had been in middle school – I had been her senior. Maybe I shouldn’t have complimented her the first time I had seen her in school. She would always use that against me. But I never had any feelings toward her. She had changed. Not to mention, sometimes she got very clingy. I clearly didn’t have the patience for that.

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