N.E.R.D

*1*

Bronx, NY
August 15th
Beyonce Knowles

Have you ever felt like you just....don't belong? No matter where you go, even when it comes to your parents? Your family? Well I feel like that ever day of my life. The only person who I think genuinely likes me is my mom.

Let me introduce myself. I'm Beyonce Giselle Knowles. I'm 17 years old, currently a senior and also the "nerdiest person in school". As people say. They also call me other names that I feel are way to mean to say. Well...I'll give you one since that would help me explain my condition a little more.

They call me "lady cock", which refers to the condition I was born with. I'm what you'd consider intersex, which means I was born with both parts, but only one works, so they removed the other one. And I'm sure that by the nickname, you can tell which one I still have.

Even though I am the laughing stock of the school, and my family, and everyone I've ever met, I try not to let it bother me, since I know that I'm way smarter than all of them, and as soon as I get out of high school, I'm gonna go to college and get a good paying job. That's really the only thing I have going for me. If I didn't have brains, I wouldn't have anything.

But, on to my love life. It's pretty non-existent, if you couldn't tell, but I have had a crush on this one girl for pretty much all my life. Her name is Onika Tonya Maraj, or Nicki, captain of the cheerleaders, smartest and prettiest girl in this school in my opinion. I'm sure it's safe to say that I'm pretty in love with her. I try not to make a big deal out of it since I can barely get close to her without the whole school making a mockery of me.

Lucky for me, she lives down the street from me, and she has since we first met. Since I first laid eyes on her. That was in preschool, when my parents moved from California to New York because of my dad's job, and the minute I walked into the classroom and saw her sitting there with her hair down, bow perfectly in tact, purple skirt and a purple shirt to match, tucked into the skirt, I knew I was in love.

*Flashback*

I walked in class with my Superman lunchbox in my hand, pushing my glasses up on my face, something I would do if I was nervous. The teacher greeted me at the door.

"Why hello. And who might you be?" She asked as she crouched down to my height, giving me a smile.

I shyly smiled back, playing with the collar on my shirt. "Beyonce Knowles."

If possible, her smile got even wider. "Ok sweetie, I'll make sure to mark you as present." She got up, grabbing my hand and walking me all the way in the class room.

Once she told me that I could sit where I want, I looked around, seeing this girl with loose curls all the way down her back, and a purple bow in her head. So I went to sit next to her since my dad's always telling me being popular and having friends is what life's about. I don't see how that helps me since I'm only 4, but I guess I listen to him.

I slowly walked over to her, pulling the chair out next to her and sitting down. She looked over at me, smiling.

My eyes went wide. She's the most...the most beautiful creature, well that's rude, most beautiful person I've ever seen. "Hi. I'm Onika, or you can call me Nicki. Whatever cooks your bacon." She held her hand out for me to shake, I gladly took it.

"Hi, I'm Beyonce." I smiled shyly.

"That's a cool name. What's it mean?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. My mom said she thought it was cute, so she named me it."

She giggled, making me laugh, and unfortunately...snort. I stopped, covering my mouth and putting my head down. "I'm sorry."

She laughed even harder. "Don't feel bad, it's funny."

I could feel my face turning red. "Im sorry."

She shrugged. "Stop saying sorry. It's funny and i like to laugh." She turned towards me. "What are those things on your teeth?" She asked with creased eye brows.

I creased my eye brows, opening my mouth and touching my braces. "These?"

She nodded. "Mhm."

"Oh....there..braces."

"Oh, what do they do?" She reached her hand up, touching them before pulling her hand away and smiling.

I blushed, looking down at my lap and shrugging. "They just...keep my teeth straight."

Her eyes lit up. "That's cool. I want them but my dentist says I'm to young."

I laughed. "My dentist doesn't understand why I'm this young and my teeth are like this."

We both started laughing. Her laughter only made me realize that I'm definitely in love with her. No doubt.

****************************************

Now we're in high school, and i feel the exact same way about her, except I'm sure that it's actual love.

She's always been nice to me, and i know for a fact that were friends, but of course she'd never go out with me because I'm the laughing stock of the school, she has an image to uphold, and I'd severely mess it up for her, and I wouldn't want that for her. So the only time I ever talk to her is when were....in our space, which I consider the neighborhood we live in.

The one time I talked to her in school, I got my ass beat, and she got slack for even talking to me. She knows how much I like her, I've made it pretty evident over the years of us being...friends I guess you could call it. But I'd never push myself on her, even if she doesn't want me.

I know I don't and never will want anyone else. She's the light of my eye and that'll never change as far as I'm concerned concerned.

Guys, I really hope you like it. It's gonna get better, this is just a snippet, but tell me if you like it! ♥️♥️♥️