Forget-Me Not

Chapter 8

"Hey Luddie!" a cheery voice echoed through the apartment. The voice felt familiar, though I couldn't put a name or face to it. Curiosity got the best of me, so I went to look for the source. It sounded as though it came from the kitchen.

As I approached the doorway, I peeked in to see Ludwig embarrassing a shorter, tanned skin man with copper hair and a peculiar curl sticking out. I did not know this stranger, but something in my chest burned at the sight. I wasn't able to wallow in the feeling for long though as another voice came from behind me:

"Hello Arthur-san, it's good to see you up and about."

Turning around, I came face to face with another short man, this time with very dark, brown (or was it black) hair and brown eyes. "Uh...yes...hello. Good to see you..."

"Kiku. Honda Kiku," he said with a slight bow. So this was our mutual friend to set us up. He didn't seem like the romance type, then again, I didn't know him anymore. "Don't worry about those two, Feli-Kun is always like that with everyone."

How did he know? And I thought Francis was a strange one. Not that he was like Francis. If anything, he was far from it. But at the same time, there was something really strange, like he was all-knowing. I shook my head, trying to push down these feelings. This was my friend after all and he seemed respectful enough (unlike some Frenchman I know).

"So...uh...what are you guys doing here?"

"Ludwig invited us over for dinner." So that's why he was spending so much time in the kitchen today. I could have helped him, especially after he's been cooking for me for the past two weeks. Then again, whenever I entered the kitchen, Ludwig seemed to tense up.

"Oh, Kiku you made it!" came the same cheery Italian accent from earlier. As the two guests began chatting, I felt something grab my hand. I turned to find Ludwig, his brows furrowed slightly as he met my eyes.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"Yes...just a little surprised is all." A strange glint flickered through his eyes. Guilt perhaps? "I-I had to meet them eventually so now's as good a time as any," I quickly added and squeezed his hand in hopes of further comforting him.

He gave a small smile, then directed his attention to our guests. "Okay gentlemen, shall we move to the living room?"

--------------------------------------------------------

By 5:30, Francis and Alfred had also joined us. All of us were huddled in the now cramped living room, talking and laughing about "shenanigans" (according to Alfred) we had been up to these past weeks. Nothing about the past, nothing about the accident, nothing about my lack of memories. It was warm, it was happy, and I felt more comfortable than I had ever felt since the accident.

"Oh my god," Alfred said between laughs, "that reminds me of the time Arthur-"

With those few words, my stomach sank. Now of all times that idiot had to go and ruin the moment. I must have begun squeezing Ludwig's hand as he squeezed back and grazed my palm with his thumb. It was comforting, but at the same time, Alfred only continued, not realizing the growing thickness of the air. It didn't seem I was the only one as everyone else went silent and their eyes wandered to anything that wasn't Alfred or me. As the story continued, my heartbeat quickened and the dark thoughts I had been pushing away from the past week came front and center.

'You're ruining everything.'

'You made them sad.'

'Look how they pity you.'

'Don't make a fuss. It'll only make it worse.'

Kiku eventually leaned over and whispered, "Arthur-san, let's get some air." Part of me didn't want to leave the warmth of Ludwig's hand, but on the other hand, I felt I would lose my mind if I stayed any longer. So I followed the Japanese man out of the room and building without a word.

As my skin hit the cool night air, I felt much lighter. I took in a deep breath and looked towards the sky, scanning for any stars. It was a quiet night other than the slight whistle of the wind. After a few more breaths, I felt my mind clear and my heart return to a normal pace.

I had almost forgotten that Kiku had come out with me. "Don't mind Al. He's...He's just...He can't read the mood and has no filter whatsoever." He looked over at me with a soft smile. Unfortunately, I couldn't return it. "You don't have to feel so bad about it. We care about you, memories or not. You said it yourself, didn't you? You're still Arthur."

How did he know all this? Was I that easy to read or was he just very good at reading people in general? Something told me it was the latter. I had to avert my gaze to the ground as embarrassment grew.

"Can we not talk about this with anyone?" I whispered.

"Okay...but please, don't let this get you down. I know how you can be with yourself." With that I heard his footsteps get farther and farther away, leaving me alone in the quiet of the night with myself and my thoughts.