The Rockin' Rodents

The Love Shack

Garda O'Reilly dropped Ger, Johnny, and their gear off at Johnny's place, before bringing Ari home. Johnny's house was a country manor. Its plain brick exterior, red door, white window sills, and terracotta slated roof made it look like a child's drawing of a house.

Johnny had converted a large unused stone shed into a rehearsal space. He called it The Love Shack after the song by the B-52's. Well, that's what Ger supposed he had named it after. As far as he could tell, no love was going on there.

They brought the cables, amps, and instruments inside. Ger had moved a lot of the stock from the music shop to here. Hastily erected shelves held row after row of CDs and even some vinyl. Johnny's drum kit occupied the right-hand corner and an old pea-green sofa and a thin nightstand with a stereo on top were pushed up against the shelves leaving just enough space for a rug. Ari and Ger would play here while Johnny sat behind his drums. They spent most of their time here listening to and discussing and often arguing about music. If they spent as much time practicing, as they did try to decide if Nevermind by Nirvana or Ten by Pearl Jam were the better albums, they'd be the greatest musicians in all of Ballycraicsdown.

Ballycraicsdown although small, was known for its music and musicians. Ger's father and uncle Eddie were well-known musicians in the county and virtually everyone played an instrument or could sing a song of some kind. Even though it was off the beaten track odd groups of tourists would come for the live music sessions at the local pub.

Ger remembered how imaginative his dad could be in fleecing them of their dollars. Once when Uncle Eddie, a history teacher by trade, explained the origin of the "famine walls" to a group of Americans. They listened wide-eyed as his uncle explained that the walls were built by starving farmers during the famine, under the orders of the English Landlords, so the farmers wouldn't get an "easy ride" if they were given some charity of food.

Ger's dad immediately started selling rocks to the American tourists, with fake certificates of origin. It was the tourists that kept the music shop alive in the times of the Napster apocalypse and the movement of music online. Now, Dad had disappeared, Ger wasn't sure that he and his mum could keep it alive.

Once they'd set the equipment up Johnny immediately began rolling a blunt, and then tucked it between his upper earlobe and shaven cranium and stood to attention.

"And what will sir be having today?" Johnny spoke like a posh waiter in a Michelin star restaurant.

"Any recommendations?" replied Ger. When Ari wasn't here this was a silly game they liked to play.

"K-pop?"

"Dessert before dinner?"

"Cats the musical?"

"Good sir, I want a meal and you offer me kibble"

"How would sir feel about a fruity little one-hit wonder? I have a very rare copy of..."

"No Johnny. I need some substance. Bring me the house's finest Meatloaf," Ger said with a flick of his hand for added melodrama.

"You've got to be feckin kiddin' me," Johnny broke character for a second.

"It's my choice, Johnny. It's my turn. This isn't Nam; there are rules," Ger said quoting from The Big Lebowski, one of Johnny's favorite movies.

"Two out of Three ain't bad?" Johnny continued negotiating, if he couldn't change the artist, he at least hoped to change the song.

"No Johnny. You know what I want. I need pure musical schlock"

"OK, Fine."

Johnny put the song on.

The piano chords stacked upon one another, building to the first of many crescendos. Ger and Johnny immediately sang along with the opening lines.

I would do anything for love,

I wouldn't lie to you

And that's a fact,

Johnny "harmonized" in a high-pitched falsetto. The boys were so lost on their lips sync battle that they didn't notice Ari burst in through the door. She was very disappointed, as it had been a deliciously dramatic entrance, wasted on these pogoing clowns.

When they did finally notice her they were on their knees and begging whoever Meatloaf was begging to on the track.

"Sorry to interrupt," she said. "I ran into Rayan, he says mum and dad have found out that I didn't spend the weekend at Mary O' Hara's. I'm grounded till further notice, I've just got to go and take my punishment. I think that between this and the last gig we played, Glue is Blue needs to go on Hiatus."

"The Rhythm Stick Banquet is the name of the band."

"Johnny!" Ari and Ger shouted in unison.

Johnny looked downcast and for a moment an uncomfortable silence descended on the three friends.

"I'd better go, I'll just get in more trouble the longer I stay out." with tears in her eyes she left.

"Well, that's it boyo. We've officially broken up," said Johnny, who if he wasn't a skinhead, you could have described as crestfallen.