Between the Lines // Danny Griffin

Chapter 8

Dear Diary,

today was incredibly confusing and I honestly don't know how what to think. It started just fine... just a normal day. Then everything changed. Daniel told me he doesn't have a girlfriend! Can you believe it? It is all a lie... a lie he created because he doesn't wanna date. I mean it kinda makes sense I guess. People think he's taken so... but why tell me? Why am I the exception that can know? I mean, I'm sure his friends know, but why should I know too? And to top that... he said I'm beautiful! Me! Now one ever called me beautiful. And he said I'm smart... and funny... for a second it felt like he was flirting with me, which obviously can't be because he doesn't wanna date. Why say such things then? This is all so confusing! That was definitely not what I signed up for when I said I wanted to do an exchange year! I should just get him out of my head. At least any romantic thoughts about him. He doesn't wanna date.

As if that isn't already enough to deal with... something strange happened today. When we were at the park I met some of Daniel's friends and his friend Patrick... I don't know... I felt something. The second I looked at him it was there. This tingly sensation... I couldn't think clearly for the rest of the afternoon. What is wrong with me? At home I'm hardly attracted to any guy at all and as soon as I get to London I develop feelings for two guys?? What is happening? This isn't me! I'm the girl who puts logic first. Of course, I'm hopelessly romantic but... not like this! Especially not with two guys! I really need to get my head straight again. I came here to learn something and it was definitely not how to catch feelings and get hurt. Daniel doesn't wanna date and Patrick... I don't know a single thing about him! This is just crazy and it needs to stop right now.

"Lauren! Time for breakfast!" I put away my diary, safely storing it under my pillow, and head downstairs. I take a deep breath, trying to push away the emotional chaos that is currently going on in my head. "Good Morning Julia." I sit down at the table, a big smile on my face. Julia places a few blueberry pancakes on my plate. They smell delicious! I take a big bite. "MHMMM" I mumble through my filled mouth. Julia just laughs a little. "Those are the best pancakes I ever had!" I exclaim once I finished them. Julia smiles a big smile. "I'm glad you enjoyed them!" I nod euphorically. "You need to tell me how to make them!" Her smile brightens. "Saturday morning?" - "YES!" We both start laughing. I grab my backpack and make my way to school. "See you after school!" I say before I walk out the door.

"Well don't you look astonishing Ms. Winter." I roll my eyes before I turn around to Daniel. "Good Morning to you too, Daniel." He has a bright smile on his face before I know it he pulls me into a hug. I'm so surprised by that small gesture I catch my breath. When he lets go I know damn well that my cheeks are burning red. Either he doesn't realize it or he's nice enough not to make a joke about it. "So, you hanging out with us this afternoon again?" I shake my head slightly and I swear I can see a glimpse of disappointment on his face. I'm not sure thought because after not even a second it's gone. "Sorry... I can't... got plans with my host mum." I hate lying but right now I have to. I can't spend another afternoon with him, and potentially Patrick, before I sort out my emotions. I truly want him and I to be friends but I need a minute to organize my thoughts.

"Can I have your phone for a second?" I'm ripped out of my thoughts so suddenly I don't think about it and just hand him my phone. When he returns it I tilt my head a little, confused. "If your plans change... just text me." He shrugs his shoulders, making clear that this isn't a big deal and I know it shouldn't be but... him giving me his phone number seems so intimate... "Anyways. I'll see you in class." With that he leaves me standing in the hallway, my thoughts going crazy. I somehow manage to make my feet move towards my classroom. On the way I bump into Lily. "Where are your thoughts today, Lauren?" She hooks her arm with mine and we continue walking together. I don't respond to her question but apparently that's an answer for her. "It's Danny, isn't it?" Again, I stay silent. "What were you guys up to yesterday? Kimberly was furious!" I roll my eyes at the mention of her. "It's really non of her business." It's really getting on my nerves how everyone seems to bring her up at every occasion.

"But we didn't do much. Just hung out at Greenwich Park." Her eyes widen. "Greenwich? Isn't that where you live?" I nod. "How did he know?" I shrug my shoulders. "I guess I must have mentioned it." After all the emotional drama I completely forgot how freaked out I was about the fact that he took us to Greenwich even though they apparently haven't been there for a while. Lily seems satisfied with my answer though. "Lauren, you know he has a girlfriend." I stop myself right before I spill his secret. "We're just friends." I wonder if I'm telling her that or if I'm reminding myself. I was a little too disappointed about his sudden leave earlier. I truly shouldn't care. "If you say so." Lily responds. In this moment I decide that I need someone to help me through my emotional mess. Lily was so nice to me the past two days and I don't really have anyone else to talk to here so... "But there may be someone else."