I Wish It Was You

4 Years Without You

"Why are you acting like this??? I don't get it! I do everything you ask, I love you unconditionally! And you just push and push and push me further away!"

"Maybe if you didn't act like a fucking slut when drunk! We wouldn't have these issues!"

"Excuse me?!" The ginger said angrily.

"You don't think I saw the way Tachihara looked at you? How you looked at him?" The brunette accused him.

"Are you fucking kidding me right now?! You actually for ONE SECOND think I want Tachihara?!? I am with you! I am always trying my hardest to be with you! To make you fucking happy! How dare you have the nerve to sit here and accuse me of something like that!" He said hitting the brunette's chest.

The brunette pushed him and the ginger fell on his behind. "Don't sit here and act like you haven't opened your legs to any little attention and love you got. You're nothing without me, you have no one." The brunette realized what he said and it was already out, and he couldn't take it back.

"... I'm done with you... Get out."

"Chuu-"

"Get out!! Get the fuck out!!" He tried to reach for him. "Don't you fucking touch me! Don't you ever fucking touch me again! Just... fucking go! GO!"

The brunette left and slammed the door behind him. Chuuya locked the door when he left and he sat in the entryway of his home and burst into tears.

4 Years Later

It had been 4 years since Chuuya and Dazai had seen each other. Chuuya had learned how to cope without Dazai. It was hard, he spent a lot of time crying and drinking. He felt alone a lot of it. He even tried therapy because he was feeling so depressed. It wasn't much help, because Chuuya always ended up crying for the 30 minute sessions. And his therapist had decided he had chronic depression, and he had given him Citalopram, to keep his mood at least normal. Dazai had ripped his heart out, but he was dealing. The best he knew how. Chuuya was brushing through his hair and he sighed. He really didn't want to go to work, it was just one of those hard days for him. But he sucked it up, took his medicine to help with his depression, and he went ahead to work. It was a gloomy day in Yokohama, it didn't brighten Chuuya's mood at all. He was almost at work but decided to make a quick stop for coffee. Chuuya pulled into a parking spot and he turned off his engine. Chuuya got out of the car, and he locked it, going inside the coffee shop. Chuuya was standing in line waiting patiently for a few minutes when he suddenly felt a hand on his waist. Chuuya elbowed the man.

"What the fuck?!" Chuuya's eyes widened as he turned around and looked at the man. Chuuya's body went stiff and he was at a loss for words. He was staring dead into the eyes of the man he had not seen in 4 years. But he looked different. He looked a lot older, and he even had a beard. Which was unusual for Dazai.

Chuuya didn't know what to say. He couldn't form the words so he just walked out. The brunette followed right after him and he grabbed Chuuya's arm.

"Chuuya? Hey."

Chuuya snatched away. "Don't! Just don't fucking touch me..."

"Chuuya..."

"Leave me alone." Chuuya said clearly and coldly.

"Wait! Can we talk? Please?"

"No... no we can't..." Chuuya's voice was trembling. Fuck he hated this.

"I don't think you understand. I know what this looks like. I know how you must be feeling confused and hurt, because this was around the time when I treated you the worst."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I am Dazai. I'm just not... your Dazai. I was working a case. In the future, and I got hit by an ability user. It switched me and your present Dazai. So he... is with the Chuuya I know years from now."

Chuuya couldn't deal with this. He didn't have the patience. He didn't have the time. And he could have given a shit less.

"No. No fucking way. I'm not doing this." Chuuya said frustrated. "I don't care. You sound ridiculous and crazy, if this is your sick way of trying to say sorry after 4 fucking years. Then go fuck yourself." Chuuya went to open his car door but it was quickly closed back by the older brunette.

"This isn't a joke and I'm not lying. I swear it. I'm 34 years old, and I am married to you in my timeline. And we have one son, and one daughter. I know you don't believe me but-"

"Your right. I don't. Not one bit."

Dazai sighed. "I can tell you something about you that I know that I shouldn't because you have not told me yet. And you never planned to; but eventually did."

Chuuya crosses his arms, annoyed. "I'm listening."

"I know that you're on antidepressants because of me. I know how when we first broke up you drank a lot thinking it'd numb the pain. I know you used to cry yourself to sleep, and you isolated yourself from anything and anyone. I know-"

"...Stop! What the fuck have you been doing huh?? Following me?? Spying on me??"

"No...! No...!" Dazai reached out and cupped his face. "I know this because you told me. Years later from now. Please just... please trust me. I know it's hard given the circumstances right now, and how you're feeling. But please listen to me."

Chuuya shook his head. "I can't... no... I can't." Chuuya's eyes started tearing up. And he pulled away from the brunette. Chuuya got into his car and closed the door.

"Chuuya! Please don't go...! Chuuya!"

Chuuya ignored him and he backed out and drove away. Leaving the brunette standing there. Chuuya gripped the steering wheel tighter. He just wanted to forget about it. Head into work and pretend it never happened. It wasn't his problem. What did he care? The ADA could handle it. But when Chuuya got out of his car, and he saw the card wedged between the window. Forgetting it may be harder than he thought.