Deception

maybe just a strong dislike

"so Max where do you want to go first?" Nat broke the silence they had arrived at the mall a few moments ago. 

"umm you pick?" I asked 

"ok how about there" nat says kindly as she points so the fancy dress shop with elegant dresses displayed in the front glass. a confused look settled on my face .

"why" I ask 

"because your dad is throwing a party tomorrow" Nat spoke as if it was implied but the confusion on my face deepened and nat clarified. 

"and your going " my face draped. 

"no, no, no, no, no, no" I start rambling nat held up a hand and scrunched her nose 

"you are going and pepper gets back tonight so she is expecting you there if not prepare to feel her wrath" she said it as if joking but they both knew that she was not. so i drew my mouth into a tight line shake my head. as i walks into the store that looks like the dresses cost more then my life. 

"here try this one on" nat handed me a yellow dress I raised a brow but I oblige when I come out Nat laughs and I surpassingly give a giggle a real one. we go through dress after dress till nat lands one .the one, the one that nat had been hunting for all day and she gave a little gasp 

"thats the one" 

"ok now we can go?" I ask nat doesn't answer she is staring at the dress 

"why don't you take a look in the mirror and see juts how beautiful you truly look, max" nat offers. I was going to decline but I found myself unconsciously walking to the mirror. I looked I guess a little less then ugly. nat came up from behind me and gave my arms little squeeze and smiled at me a genuine smile that much I could see in the reflection. 

 the gesture of affection made me breathe heavy and my heart speed up I could conceal it for now. I quickly dropped the smile and shrugged off nat's hand. she looked a bit taken back I rush to the change rooms but not fast enough to look suspicious.i was rushing to get free of the restricting material my breath came in fast paced heaves my heart was beating so fast I was sure it was going to quit I have had panic attacks before but nothing this bad my hand were shaking so bad I couldn't undo the zipper I was getting frustrated my knees felt like they were going to give out leaving me a insignificant puddle of panic on the floor. I inevitable slid to the floor it felt like hours when in reality it was 1 minute Natasha didn't even knock she just opened the door she took in what she was seeing then instantly shut the door behind her, and came to my side she took either side of my face in her hands my eyes were darting from object to object she lifted my head so my eyes could meet hers 

"look at me, look at me " she said softly as if talking to a baby I didn't have the energy to deny her so I did 

"its ok it ok your fine your safe" she cooed. safe the word hit me like a toy train I've never been safe I will never be safe no one can keep me safe as soon I do what needs to be done I will have a price so big on my head you could buy mount Everest as Tony Starks daughter red room agent and soon to be destroyer of hydra. 

as soon as nat figures out who I am and what I've done she will hate me as much as I hate myself wait I don't care about her validation my heart sped up and my breath quickened I was losing myself in  this moment my hands shook and nat could tell so she dropped my face and put her arms around be whispering a soft Russian lullaby an in that moment maybe I didn't hate Natasha Romanoff just a strong dislike.

ok i'm sensing a mamma spider moment, I don't know who's she should have a relationship with in the future or if she even should. so there is Pietro who would be close to her age maybe a year older if that but then there's Peter he would only be 15 in civil war when they meet and max would be around 17 I just think thats a big age age but if thats what everyone wants to see I will fudge a few things to make them both the same age drop a comment if you have any idea or requests and as always if you enjoyed this chapter vote if you can (: