Damnant Quod Non Intellegunt

An Update from the Future

Hey guys!
Since I don't plan on continuing this story anymore, I figured I give a little insight into my plans for what could have happened.
Basically, Killua and Gon would've become closer and would've learned to respect each other. For this story, I wanted to focus a lot on how hard it is for people who have a been hurt before to learn to trust again and how respect needs to be earned. It would've been a hard fought battle for the two of them to actually get close to every being friends, but it would naturally progress into a relationship. Of course, since Gon's literally the King of Hell, things would've gotten a bit ... sexual — and if I'm honest, I don't think I would've been able to write those parts because I get horrible second hand embarrassment from just writing two characters being affectionate, much less doing the devils tango.
As for important plot points, I know for a fact that Gon was going to beat the shit out of Silva, they were going to go out and tag some buildings because why not, there's was probably going to be your casual blood sucking scene because I set up that Gon gets energy from blood.
What I think is the most important thing is what finally unbinds the two. Probably on a super chill night, after a full day of just vibing, they'd fall asleep in the attic (maybe kissing by then but idk 🤷‍♀️) and Gon would wake up to find that the ring on his finger was lose, so he takes it off and reads the inside of the ban, which has — engraved in Latin — genuina nexum. This basically translates to genuine connection, which is what Killua had been longing for since forever.
And, after Gon leaving and getting Hell in check and coming back to save Killua from some big bad bullies, they'd finally be able to live happily ever after, making the agreement that Killua would be allowed to give his soul to Gon when he turned 21, which gives him a few years to actually think about it.
And that's it. That is what my plans for DQNI were. Obviously, I'm not going to be writing anymore of this, but I had fun while writing. This was probably one of the ones I actually had to get in a moody mood to write because it calls for me to be a little more ... critical, let's say, of how Killua would actually feel. Like, I really didn't want it to just be them naturally clicking into place. I wanted there to be push back and I wanted them to struggle to actually connect with each other. Sometimes I pulled it off, but other times I didn't. I actually remember rewriting a whole part of chapter 7 because it seemed like things were too easy. Like, these two have extremely different personalities, live in extremely different environments, and have extremely different motivations. Of course it's not going to click.
If I was to write DQNI now I would change a few things. First off, Killua would be much older. Probably 20 to 25. He'd be in university, already getting ready to be forced into taking over the family business, just prepared for the monotonous life set before him. I'd drop the whole thing about his family abandoning him for being gay and make it so that they would forced him into places that would "correct" his behaviour, because the Zoldyck fucking would. Another thing I'd change — but would probably also change because Killua would be older — this how he's treated at school. My original thought was just him being bullied, but I would change it so that he's feared. People don't want to get close to him because he is scarily intelligent and seems haughty.
There's probably other things I'd change. Like how much I wrote Killua to cry. I do think crying is a healthy way of venting emotions, but we all know that Killua doesn't know how to properly vent his feelings. He's a ball of packed up emotions from trauma, there's no way he'd so easily cry.
This is probably just Croatian to my past self and considering it's so late at night — or early in the morning — I'm more so ranting about what could've been.
There's a part of me know that would've completely changed this story because it has so much potential. To be honest, I probably wouldn't have ever written them to actually be in a relationship if I had written it now. I probably would've left it at them coming to an understanding and a companionship with one another. I probably would've written DQNI Killua as an asexual because that's the vibe I get from thinking about how I'd rewrite the story.
I also think I would push the narrative of Alluka and Killua a little further. In the version I've written, it's much more of a Killua won't tell Alluka anything so how is she supposed to know, but I don't think it's a bad idea to explore the fact that Alluka is fully aware that for her to be able to live the life that she wants, Killua has to live a life he doesn't want. I just think that's super interesting and how Killua is fine with it because he thinks it's the only way that he could ever be able be useful to anyone? For them to us him. Just, do you see the story potential!!!
Obviously, this is all just speculation and what not, but I think it's interesting to see how my methods of writing stories has changed. Obviously, when I first started I was just posting to post and didn't have anymore plans than I wanted Killua and Gon to be in a happy relationship, but now my brain has been hard wired to to do something completely different.
Let me know if you think the difference in how I would've told this story is interesting.
Again, a huge thank you for the continuous support. I'm sorry that I never finished this story, but I figured a speculates ending is better than nothing.
Hopefully, this will give a bit of closure to DQNI and that maybe it'll spark some ideas in you guys because younger me just had a huge brain full of a million ideas and some of them were really fucking good.