a sky full of stars

19

nick pov
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i woke up sweating. my bedsheets were so tangled around me that i couldn't escape. her. i'd dreamt about her. but i couldn't tell anyone, they couldn't know. besides, i need to be there for stella. there for her when she has bad dreams, there for her when she needs someone's shoulder to cry on.

is it too soon?

more so, is she right for me? i couldn't help but think that all girls are the same, like juice once said. flashes of maddy crossed my mind every now and again, when we were together. i could see her in everything stella did, and it scares me.

i got up from my bed and walked to the window, to check how dark the sky was. the first thing i laid my eyes on was the north star. i slowly looked just to the right of it, like stella once said on that date, if that even was a date.

there it was. cassiopeia. stella's stars. i couldn't help but think of the song. the song thst played in my head whenever i thought of her.

i turned from the window, pulling my eyes away from the stars. i'd never forget that night.

i picked up my phone from the nightstand and pulled up spotify. i was going on a walk. i needed to clear my head, to be alone for a while.

STELLA'A STARS
by armstrong.00

-a sky full of stars                    11 days ago
-star shopping                         11 days ago
-the night we met                   11 days ago
-sparks                                      11 days ago
-the nights                                11 days ago
-ocean eyes                              10 days ago
-circles                                       8 days ago
-how to never stop being sad 4 days ago
-you were good to me              4 days ago
-say you won't let go                3 days ago
-all girls are the same              3 days ago
-i cant handle change         23 hours ago
-breezeblocks                        17 hours ago
-you're somebody else         17 hours ago
-where's my love                  15 hours ago

i pulled out my headphones and sat on the kitchen counter as i untangled them. or... tried to.

after a few minutes i gave up, and threw the headphones on the table. i grabbed my beats from the couch and walked out the front door.

her songs started playing and i couldn't help but think what we could be. a single tear escaped and rolled down my cheek, and as i turned the corner of our street, i let my legs take me wherever they wanted. i didn't care where i went, just far away from everyone for at least an hour.

the lyrics plagued my head whichever song i played. even my day to day playlists brought back memories of her, and i'm not even sure which her.

i found myself sat in a field, and it took me a minute, but i realised it was the field that we layed in on the night we met. coincidentally, the lord huron song started playing as it came into my head.

i layed in the same spot that we had for a few minutes, and stared at the stars. thought of what i wished we had. what i'm scared we'll never have.

stella pov
no matter how many times i messaged him, he didn't reply. in the back of my mind, i was worried, but i didn't want to overthink it.

i did. i couldn't stop it, and it was happening before it had even started. earlier, i couldn't sleep, so i'd climbed onto my roof to stare at the stars.

and for some reason, my eyes were drawn to the same spot, no matter how hard i tried to look for different stars.

i picked up my phone again, half hoping for a reply. was it something i said? something i did? i'd messed up. just like every friendship... ever.