The Alpha Kings Queen

xvii.

" she is a queen, her soul is royalty "

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                       For a brief moment the world halts, there is an abundance of silence where all I can focus on is the words forming beneath my fingertips. My eyes scanning over and over and yet still halting at the one word that squeezes my chest and stops my breathing altogether and I can't breathe...I can't...

"Cassandra." A voice abruptly ends my panic induced moment.

It's the person I least want to see right now and he is looking at me with thinly veiled guilt, eyebrows etched together in deep concern.

I snap the book shut, tucking it to my chest and look at him.

"I want you to know I handled Jared and we're discussing new options for an Alpha positioning later tonight. He won't be a problem no more."

"Okay." I whisper out, shuffling to my feet.

"Cassandra, my love. Are you okay?" He takes a step forward and I react instinctively by stepping away trying to ignore the flash of hurt that crosses his face. "What's wrong?"

I close my eyes, taking a deep breath to the loaded question he had just presented me. Every single feeling crashing down onto me like a hammer hitting a post. Hit after hit and I can hear Nolan make a sound of concern before I reopen my eyes.

"I want Sarah." My voice wavers.

"Cassandra... talk to me."

"I want Sarah." I now resolutely reply, tone hardening. "Tell her to meet me in my room. I am done for the night."

I spin on my foot and walk away, somehow feeling the pain radiating off Nolan in waves and it makes me pick up my pace just a tad more, wanting nothing of it. Not right now. Right now what I needed was my best friend and a good place to drown myself in my own feelings for the night - to make sense of what has become.

When I reach the room I blink, looking around reservedly at the sight of the cleared room, only just having remembered I had been sleeping in Nolans room the last week therefore majority of my belongings had been kept there. 

"So so oblivious," I clench my eyes tight shut.

In another hasty moment I rip off my crown from atop my head, setting it swiftly onto the dressing table along with the book, unclasping all my jewellery in my next step and placing it alongside. However my hands linger hesitantly on the necklace adorned my neck, wavering for a moment on my next course of action before huffing and pushing past the balcony doors and stepping into the night.

I focus on my breathing for a long while before a knock on the door resounds throughout.

"Come in." I do not move from my position by the rails of the balcony.

"Cassie?" Sarah quietly approaches from behind, sounding quite cautious.

I don't answer for a long moment, staring off into landscape of the night sky wishing I had a pencil and sketch pad to have the details scribbled in before the shade branches off into another darkness.

The clouds were rolling in, a storm brewing beneath the tree lines as the wind had picked up much more stronger than before.

"You knew."

There is no denying it and she knows it.

"Yes."

I sniff. "You didn't tell me."