just...leave

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It's been a few months since me and chris started having this relationship
It is actually nice....I like being loved like this

We where planning for a new video
While we where talking about it chris pulls me into the hall way
He pins me on the wall and puts his arms around my neck
"So what are you doing tonight " he asks

"Umm nothing much" I say

"So can I come over" he asks
"Sure" i say
He gives me a kiss on the cheek and goes back to the room

(Time skip)

I was sitting in the kitchen eating some cereal

I hear a knock on the door so I opened it and Chris somes dashing in and starts to kiss me I kiss back but then I push him off of me

"Chris wait...."I say
"What's up" he says

"I...I dont want us to be all about sex...I want more I want like...a relationship..." I say

He looks at me and kisses my neck then he pulls away and says
"I know....but I have katie...I love her....i- I love her...w-why am I doing this stuff with you"
He says

"Look chan....I was gonna make this our last time....because I just want to stay with Katie" he says

"O-oh..well ok..so...should we go back to it..?" I say

He starts to undress me but then he stopped
"No..I'm just gonna...go I'm sorry Chandler that I'm doing this" he says

"Wait Chris dont- please dont leave me i- I CAN MAKE THIS WORK OUT ok ok please do-) I say in a shakey voice

He comes in for a kiss it was long he pushes himself away and says "im sorry"

He runs his hands down my chest and walks away out the door

"Wait..w...wa..wait..please" I say in a shakey voice

He left me...I start to text him

Me: chris please don't do this...I love you I can make it work out please dont leave me..

Chris: I said I'm sorry...

[this user has blocked you]

I started to have a meltdown I got mad and threw my phone at a window it hit the window and broke and fell outside

I curled up in a little ball and started crying alot "why WHYY WHY WHATS WRONG WITH ME WHY CANT NO ONE LOVE ME WHYYY WHY THE FUCK" I yelled while crying I looked up and see the door swinging because of the wind I see a car pull up it seemed like Jimmy's I didn't care

I started crying more I hear footsteps come up "hey...everything ok" Jimmy says
"I just came to tell you the challenge for tomorrow" he also says

I ignore it and get up push him out the way and go out side to get my phone
I come back in and say "jim...I'm not going to do the video tomorrow"

"Oh ok" he says
I go back to sit where I was crying

"Jimmy....can you please leave" I say

"Why?"he says

"BECAUSE I DONT WANT TO BE AROUND FUCKING PEOPLE SO JUST LEAVE" I said
He hugs me and says "ok...il see you"

He gets up and leaves

I just stay sitting there crying for the rest of the night

I- I shouldn't have said anything...I could've just...said nothing and enjoy that last time....

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Idk what I'm writing 👁👄👁...

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