normal (shoni)

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normal- katie pruitt
shelby's pov
       walking down the halls of my christian private school, in the morning was calmer than usual. i wondered if today might be different. maybe today i wouldn't feel the shame.
      the shame of being the darn reason my family moved to god forsaken minnesota.
    i'm sure this state really is good but i can't stop thinking about texas or becca. god becca.
      i'd messed up big time when i kissed her. i'd messed up even more when i told her i pitied her. i'll never be able to take back those darn words. i'm just glad that her mom found her in time.
i literally refuse to kill becca off, i love her so much
     i remember praying so long and hard that night, praying that god would protect her.
     i stopped in front on the door that should be my first class, ah yes nothing like ap lit to start off the day.
      i walked in to the classroom not really eager  to be by people whom i didn't know. i found an empty desk in the middle of the class and sat there.
    "ok, welcome back to hopewell lake christian academy! students i hope you all had a great summer break. here are some friendly reminders to start off the year. the summer assignment is due by this up coming friday. mass is held after lunch on friday's.  if you get in trouble you will have to write a 500 words paper about what you did and why it was wrong which will be followed up by after school detention where you will repent for your sins and ask for forgiveness."
     what the heck.
  "any questions?" the teacher asked the class.
   i rose my hand.
     "yes, blonde girl."
      "i actually just moved here so i didn't get to do the summer assignment."
       "oh, that's fine sweetheart just make sure all your stuff from now on is turned in on time."
      "yes ma'am."
my whole life i had felt so intact with god, like he was always there, but was he just a word i had spoken? did i actually know him?
the bell to the first class rang and the class was over quicker than it started. i only had 4 classes since i was a senior this year so it was bad, it was just ap english, ap calculus, religion, and forensics. i'm honestly surprised they had that class here, but it seemed fun.
3 hours later
school ended faster than i would have expected but i was stuck in my mind for most of the day.
lunch was just starting and i knew that seniors that left after 4 period could just leave at lunch and i had no interest in staying at this school for any longer.
every boy was somehow a carbon copy of andrew, and every girl had reminded me of my old friends. everyone here seemed so perfect, i knew that i wasn't like them. i wasn't perfect by far. i feel so useless.
i walked out to the parking lot seeing some of the other seniors leaving. i made it to my car and put my bag in the passenger seat. i started the car and decided i would try to go find a place to eat lunch.
somehow i ended up in the heart of town at a cafe that i decided would be quiet enough to eat lunch and do homework at.
when i walked in there where two girls working at the counter.
"good afternoon!" the shorter one smiled.
"good afternoon to y'all too." i smiled back.
"well i'm martha and this is leah. i take it by your accent that you're not from around here."
"you'd be correct, i'm originally from texas."
"so what brings you all the way to minnesota?"
"my dad got a job promotion." i lied.
"oh that's cool. i didn't actually catch you name, that's my bad."
"oh yeah," we shared a small laugh at our awkwardness, " i'm shelby, shelby goodkind."
"well shelby goodkind, i'm leah rilke, and this is martha blackburn."
"it's quite a breath of fresh air to meet some people my age."
"judging by your uniform you go to hopewell christian don't you?" leah said as more of a statement than a question.
"yeah."
"everyone that's goes there is pretty much an asshole. i used to go there before i like begged my parents to send me to public school. i like it better there." she replies.
"i would have loved to go to the public high school here, but alas my parents are what you would call 'hard core bible thumpers'. i mean i definitely believe in god, but i feel like if i'm going to persecuted for everything i do, then we don't share the same god. ya know?"
"did i just walk into a religion class because i will walk right out if that's the case." i heard a voice from behind me exclaim.
"shelby goodkind meet toni shalifoe, hopewell lake's pride and joy." martha said.
"no toni, i was just carrying on a conversation so chill. but yes shelby, i get exactly what you're talking about." she gave me a sympathetic smile.
"so anyways what can i get you?" leah asks.
i noticed the girl whom i'm almost sure is named toni talk with martha.
"can i get a bagel and an iced vanilla latte?"
"yeah, coming right up your total is $5:25."
i fished my wallet out from my bag and grabbed my card before handing over to the towering brunette.
"here you go, and shelby if you ever need help in anything english related i'm the girl to call for." leah says as i tucked away at the table in the corner of the cafe.
"thanks, and i promise i will."
i took all my stuff out and pulled my laptop from my backpack and started working. before i knew it i was done with my coffee.
i slid out from the table and walked back over to register only to find toni and leah working.
i finally got a good glance at her. she was short, with curly black hair, she had beautiful brown eyes. she was wearing a hopewell lake basketball hoodie and some jeans, but somehow she looked stunning.
i was brought out of my thoughts by the clearing of a throat, which belonged to leah.
"shit sorry."
"oh my god i'm so sorry."
"darn it, i'm sorry." i corrected myself a final time, at this point toni was let out a small laugh from behind the counter.
"uh can i get another coffee?"
"sure thing."
      leah returned with my coffee and i handed her my card once again before returning to my work.
15 minutes later
     "ugh!" i exclaimed letting my head fall to the table.
      "what's wrong?" leah asked.
      "i can't figure out this darn calculus problem." i huffed.
      "well, lucky for you toni is like a math god."
       "hey, i am not."
       "whatever shorty, go help her."
       toni walked out from behind the counter and over to me.
     "so what seems to be the problem?"
      "i can't figure out number three to save my life."
      "oh that's pretty easy."
     "yeah, yeah math genius, can please just tell me how to do this."i replied.
     she explained the problem and worked through it with me, and as hard as i was trying to pay attention the only i was watching was her moving lips as she explained the problem.
      "you got it?"
     "earth to shelby." she waved a hand in front of my face.
      "sorry, i got lost in thought. can you please re-explain."
    she went over it again as i payed attention this time. i sort of got what she was saying.
     "got it?"
     "yeah, i think so."
     "ok, do the next two."
      i nodded and went to work.
    "is this it?" i asked after finishing my work.
     she checked over the work before responding, "yep, that's it."
       "thank you so much toni." i smiled.
      she quickly grabbed a napkin and a pen from her pocket before scribbling something down on it.
      "here's my number encase you ever need more math help." she smiled before returning to the counter.
     a while later i was done with all my work.
     "hey guys, it was great to meet y'all, but i'm all done here. i promise i'll come back soon."
     "bye shelby." leah waved.
      "bye texas." toni smiled.
      i gave them one last smile and wave before exiting the building. i drove home feeling hesitant to get out of my car.
      all i can think about is him yelling at me saying, "this is not god's path shelby, this is not where you belong.you're a supposed to be normal girl!"
       and god i'm so tried of being on my tip toes all the time because i'm scared of my father. i don't know where i fit, and honestly it's scary as hell and sometimes i wish i could be normal, i wish that the facade i had up for so long in texas was true. but it isn't it just isn't.
     after a couple minutes of calming my breathing down i entered the house.
      "shelby!"
      "hey mel! how was your first day at your new school?"
     "it was fun, i made new friends!" my sister grinned at me.
     "that's great! i happy for you, now if you'll 'cuse me i have some homework i have to go do."
    "okay!" she smiled and ran off somewhere else in the house.
      i walked up the stairs to my bedroom and pulled the napkin out of my bag.
      i thought about it for a second. is this really a good idea? considering everything.
     it's fine right? i mean i just want to be friends with her. i'm not like that.
     i take a deep breath before quickly texting her.
hey this is shelby
    moments later i get a reply.
                                          hey tex, what's up?nothing really,
i'm just kinda bored
there's not much to
do around here
                                           nonsense, there's
                                          plenty to do around
                                           here, just wait till
                                           basketball season         
                                            and you can see
                                           me at my prime:)
did i just get invited
to one of THE toni
shalifoe's basketball
games?
                                                maybe you did,
                                            and what about it?
i'm feel honored
you should be tex
it doesn't happen
much
:)
    i heard footsteps coming up the stairs and immediately shut my phone off. they were to heavy to belong to anyone else but him.
    moments later my father walked through the door.
      "hey, shelb! how was school?"
     it was much more of an easy conversation starter than him actually caring.
     "hi daddy, school was fine."
      "well that's good, mind if i pray with you for a second?"
       "of course not." i gave him my best pageant smile.
      "lord we pray that you help shelby see and know the way she was intended to be and that she will not stray from your path into loneliness. amen"
     "amen."
     "i'll see you downstairs for dinner."
     i just nodded at him.
why can't i just be normal. do what normal girls do?
why can't he just accept me?
why can't i just be me.?
it was then that i heard a ringing coming from my phone.
it read, " facetime call from toni"
i quickly answered it.
"hey tex." she smiled.
"hey yourself shalifoe." i grinned back.
"so what are ya' up to?" i asked.
"homework, care to help?"
"i can try."
she let out a small giggle, and lord did my heart melt.
"did i just hear toni shalifoe giggle."
"you absolutely did not."
"i think i did." i teased.
"shut your cake hole texas."
"why should i?"
"cause otherwise i'll show up and make you." she emptily threatened.
"sure you will."
"i don't think my daddy will take to kind to you trespassin' on our property."
"well he can't shoot me, i'm minnesota's top high school women's basketball player."
"that's a very important title you hold ms. shalifoe."
"it is indeed ms. goodkind."
"shelby who are you talkin' to up there?" i heard my father yell from the stairs.
my eyes went wide, and toni must've seen it
"you okay shelby?"
"i'm just talking to someone from school daddy." i yelled back.
"i have to got toni. i'll text you later." i quickly hung up and shoved my phone in my back pocket at this point.
he opened my door seconds later.
"sorry if i was being to loud, i was just gettin some help on homework, but i'm all done now. anything i can help you with?"
"yeah why don't you go help your mom and sister in the kitchen."
"yes sir." i gave him a smile.
i stood up and walked downstairs fearing to be in a room with him for too long.
"hey momma , hey mel."
"hey shelb." jobeth smiled.
"so what should i help with?"
"dinner's already close to done, could you please set the table sweetheart?"
"sure mom." i smiled back.
i always liked my mom, she never seemed to be judgmental like my father.
i quickly set the table then sat down on one of the island stools.
i opened my phone and started to text toni.

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