Why can't I (RayxEmma)

1

Ray's POV

I hate my life it's always been like this. This hell hole I can't get out of. It's 11 pm at night I can't sleep. I went to my right side of my bed and open my drawer and pulled out my knife and started to cut straight lines on my left forearm. Blood is such a pretty color. I went to my bathroom and got cleaned up I cleaned my knife and my cuts and covered it up with bandages and went to sleep. Then later that night I heard my mother yelling at my good for nothing father always drinking coming home drunk and telling her that he is going to kill her and me and other stuff. It's like this every single day. Until I heard a glass bottle break. I quickly ran down stairs to see what was going on. The door was open and my mom was unconscious she was laying on the floor blood coming out of her head. I didn't know what to do I stand there couldn't move or do anything I was horrified. Scared. Then my father started laughing like a mad man. I saw my mother moving a little bit. Soon my father grabbed a lighter and I noticed the gasoline was on the floor.
"I always hated you my son and your mother now we can all die together". My dad said. Then the lighter slowly fallen its like time has stopped. My mother quickly pushed me to the door and said.

"I love you Ray don't forget me" . Then once I hit myself on the floor the house in fire. Soon later the neighbors called the police and they came in 2 minutes then when everything got processed in my head I realized what just had happen. Soon I started crying and yelling why did this had to happen to me. Why did my mom had to push me? Why couldn't I died? Why did she have to die? Then I looked at my house and wiped my tears away and begin running to my burning house. Maybe my mom is still alive? Maybe she is stuck and needs help? Then the police saw that I was going to go in and stopped me. He grabbed my hand very tightly.

"Stop let me go I need to save my mom"
"Kid stop"
"No let me help her she needs me" Then the police officer made me turn to him for I can see his face.
"You know your mother is gone".
"No she isn't let me help her she is stuck"
"Snapped out of it you know she is gone I'm sorry you had to experience this but you mother is not fully gone she is now at peace she is watching over you and she is going to protect you". I looked away him I started to cry I couldn't hold it in anymore my chest and heart felt heavy. Until I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"It's time to go".  I looked at my house one more time and everything was gone. The police officer took me to his car and drove me to the police station.
"Do have any family members that might take you in"
"No".
"Do you have any access to them"
"Their all dead".    The police stayed silent and stopped asking me questions and left me alone.  Then he spoke again.
"You know my Wife owns a foster care on the first floor of our apartment there is a lot of kids there some are your age younger, and older I think it's better for you to stay there with us. What do you think um."
"It's Ray"
"Sorry what do you think Ray?"
"Ok i guess". I said looking at the window.
"I am glad to hear it"
A few weeks later...
I went to my mother's funeral and hugged the cross where she was buried.  Yuggo was with me since Diana had to take care of the kids.

"Why do you leave me mom?" I whispered cried to the cross that I was hugging.  Then Yuggo interrupted me and I looked at him.

"Look Ray I'm not really good at making people feel better but what I know is that your mom was a great person taking care of you and protecting you to the very end from your father but, you know why good people die first"
"Why"
"When you're in a garden which flowers do you pick first"
"The most beautiful ones"
"But in this cruel world there is someone that helps you in this cruel world. I know it looks depressing out of color but when you meet a person you love the world changes colors.  It changes you.  Maybe that's why I fell in love with my wife.  But I promise you Ray in this cruel world there will always be someone to bring out the darkness"
Ray listened to Yuggos words thinking maybe he will find a special someone one day. 

Hopefully he will. 

He hopes he does.

"We should head back it looks like it's going to rain".

I nodded and we both went back home. After a few days from the funeral I switched schools well it wasn't the best I always got picked on but I ignored them.  Some of the girls gave me mean looks.  So that's why I bring my jacket every single day so I don't have to look at their faces.  Sometimes I even skipped classes just to get away from them or don't even show up to school.  But then I met a white haired boy named Norman at first I didn't really like him.  He asked me if he wanted to be friends with me I said no.  But he kept bugging me so I agreed he is smart like me but I was second he was like a genius or something. Then after I became friends with him I will get beaten up but will I beat them back. Soon after their gang had more people and they started to hurt me mostly daily and I usually come home with cuts, bruises.  I always tried to hide them but Yuggo some how always found out. Soon he started to teach me martial arts so I can defend myself.  I guess it came in handy. 

11 years later....
I am now 17 years old I have been living with Yuggo and with his wife Diana for 11 years now. The kids in foster care are really nice but one of them is like my little sister. Jemima sometimes likes to play alone or she wants to play with me when I come back from school.  

"Hey Ray"
"Mhm"
"Please be careful at school I hate seeing you getting beat up by those bullies"
"Ok I will try" I said in my depressing voice.
"Promise" Jemima said hanging out her pinky in front of me.
"Promise well I better get going see ya"
"Bye Ray". Jemima quickly gave me a quick hug and went to read her book.  Once I was about to leave I heard Yuggo honking the car multiply times.
"Hurry up sleepy cyclops or I'm going to be late for work" Yuggo yelled.
"Tch"