Northern Lights

9. Dominic

The bright green shirt was splayed out on the dark blue comforter, standing out as much as Cielo did in the Hilsbury crowd. I eyed the shirt warily, undecided as to what to do with it. I’d only gotten as far as removing the tags and spreading it out on the bed. It seemed to glare up at me in accusation, demanding I either wear the damn thing or throw it out. It was a decision I should have made a long time ago, and it annoyed me that it had taken Cielo’s goading to force the decision.

I fingered the fabric, twining the soft but thick shirt between my fingers. Cielo was outside, busying himself with painting the walls of the tool shed. The paint had been long overdue for another coat, and I wanted him out of the way when the fertilizer truck showed up.

“It’s not like it’s hurting anyone,” I mumbled to the quiet room.

Just like going to have a bit of fun out in Portland didn’t hurt anyone. Just like my attraction to men didn’t hurt anyone. Yet the idea of openly wearing the shirt seemed as abhorrent to me as it would be for me to hold a man’s hand while walking down the street in Hilsbury. To stand out, to be different, invited more attention than I was comfortable with, and more judgment than I wanted.

Then I remembered Cielo’s casual comment about the color looking good on me.

With a huff, I grabbed the shirt I was wearing and ripped it off over my head. Before I could second guess myself, I snatched the bright green shirt from the bed and yanked it on. Feeling like an off-color Christmas light, I turned to the mirror, preparing for the worst. It was definitely a brighter color than I’d ever worn before, but I was relieved to find out it wasn’t as bad as I thought. It didn’t exactly make me glow with newfound confidence and individuality, but I thought it looked alright against my skin, a nice contrast to my darker tones.

With a shrug, I pulled on my jacket and made my way outside. Cielo was humming another song I didn’t immediately recognize. I kept meaning to ask him where the songs came from but was afraid of the answer. I’d heard some of the music that was popular outside the locally owned radio stations, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to consider myself a fan. It was better, in my mind, for me to enjoy the music without ever digging deeper into the source.

Cielo was dressed in another pair of overalls I had been forced to buy. It had either been that or keep dressing him in the same pair. I didn’t feel like doing laundry repeatedly, so I’d simply bought a few extra pairs. The Northern Lights were soon to start, and it didn’t look like his friends were any closer to arriving than before.

I cared less and less about that, having become almost completely comfortable with Cielo’s presence. As if feeling my attention, he looked up, shading his eyes against the afternoon sun and smiling toward me. His warm expression grew brighter in the sunlight, and I felt my heart skip a beat.

It had become both easier and harder to have him around all the time. On one hand, his constant presence was utterly comforting. I would have never thought of myself as someone who enjoyed another’s presence for extended periods, but Cielo had become a warm beacon to sun myself with. On the other hand, it was becoming steadily more difficult to keep my hands to myself. Every time he looked at me with a smile in his eyes, or that teasing turn at the corner of his lips, I had to fight the urge to shove him against the wall and kiss him harder than I’d ever kissed anyone.

That lustful urge rose once again when his eyes roamed over my body with interest. Despite my initial warning against it, Cielo’s interest in me hadn’t gone away in the slightest. The man was far more subtle about paying too much attention to me, but not so subtle that it was impossible to see. I hadn’t missed the lingering stares, and I hadn’t been able to stop myself from lingering longer than necessary in my towel or a pair of shorts when I knew he was looking.