!! This chapter might trigger some people who suffer with panic attacks and anxiety attacks!! ——————————————————————————— y/n's pov ——————————————————————————— I woke up and realized I was still in FaceTime with Kalynn. She was sleeping and snoring quietly. I sat my head up on my hand and smiled softly. I clicked th FaceTime photo thing a few times not knowing it would wake her up. "Mhaægh" she groaned. I laughed and picked up my phone. "Holy shit!" I said looking at my phone batteries percentage. "I'm sorry Kalynn my phones about to die" I frowned. "That's fine!" She smiled. Her morning voice was so cute. "Okay bye! I'll call you later..? If that's okay with you" i said nervously. "Yeah! Yeah that's okay!" I said I waved and ran to my room. I put my phone in it's charger and went into my bathroom. I took a shower and brushed my teeth and changed into:
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I picked up my backpack and put my notebooks, coloring pencils and other drawing tools into it. I walked over to our local coffee shop I always went to. New York is such a beautiful place, I just wish people would treat it that way. I got my usual and walked to the park and sat down. I took my earphones and put them into my phone. I started playing Riptide by Vance Joy. I sketched how I was feeling about Kalynn which was very hurt of energy like. I couldn't even explain how I felt but obviously it couldn't be a crush, right? I wondered how Kalynn was feeling about me, us even though we aren't dating it's just low key- high key flirting. I mean all friends do that, right? I'm sure of it. All of a sudden my thoughts crowded me and I felt like a couldn't breath, as if I was dying. I tried a method that my therapist recommended.
5: try to name 5 things I could see around me My earphones, a red colored pencil, my pen, a leaf, and tree.
4: try to think of 4 things I could touch My hair, my sweater, my books, and my backpack
3: try to name 3 things I could hear around me I could hear laughing from a woman on the phone behind me, I could hear my shakily reap breaths, and the wind blowing my hair out of my face.
2: try to name 2 things I could smell I could smell perfume from the same woman who was talking on the phone and my coffee.
1: try to name one thing I can taste I could taste my coffee.
I took a few deep breaths after and packed my things and started walking. I called Kalynn, one of the people I could call to make me feel better. She picked up quickly and saw that I had been crying. "Hey, what's wrong are you okay?" She asked "No, I just had a anxiety attack." I muttered still walking. "Oh, I'm sorry.. are you okay? Where are you going?" She asked the questions fast, worriedly. "Home" I said nonchalantly. "Okay.. just call me when you get there, okay?" She said. "Yeah" I said before hanging up.
I got home and placed my backpack at the door closing it. "Hey! My little brother yelled. "What!" I yelled back. "Can you help me with something" he said "Yeah sure... are you in my room?" I asked. "Why do you have 2 pages on your favorite things about Kalynn, if you don't like her?" He said smirking. "Because.. I'm a fan" I said grabbing my notebook and pushed him out of my room. I threw it back onto my beanbag and plopped on my bed. I sat up after a few minutes and pulled of my shoes and threw them somewhere I wasn't sure of. I grabbed my computer and went on Spotify and played my painting playlist. I grabbed my painting supplies and painted a random thing, a blob, but I guess my brain thought it was meaningful. I put it on my desk and cleaned up a bit before calling Kalynn.
She picked up quickly, again "Hey" I said "Hey y/n!" She said. "Okay, I wanted you to call me because I have a surprise for you" she said smiling really hard. "What is it.. you're scaring me" I said nervously laughing. "It's not bad!" She assured me. "Okay, Me, Minx and Weston are gonna stream tomorrow, and I invited you.. and they said yes" she said still smiling waiting for my answer. "YES! Kalynn thank you so much!" I yelled. "Soo what's the answer?" She asked putting her hands up next to her. "Ye- I was about answer I then heard my brother leave his bat cave and yell "ARE YOU TAKING YOU KALYNN YOUR CRU-" I hung up right then and there I grabbed my phone and walked to my room. "That was close" I said. I laughed and dropped my hand with my phone in it. It plopped on my bed with my hand.
