My Cutie 『seungjin』✔️

Chapter .10.

{not proofread}

Seungmin's POV:

Monday:

Today is Monday and I don't want to go to work but I have to
I try to get up but I'm so tired and exhausted

After about ten minutes of trying to get out of bed I finally do and start to get dressed.

I dress in an oversized black hoodie and skinny jeans (they used to be skinny jeans now they are loose) throw on my glasses and walk downstairs to the kitchen

I feed snow but I just grad a bottle of water for myself. I walk over to the door and put my shoes on then walk out.

I walk to JYP witch was a very bad idea
I feel light headed
I almost passed out when I walked into the styling room. Pushing the door open was harder than I thought
I put on a fake smile and greet everyone
"Hello" I force out a happy voice
"Seungmin we missed you"
No they don't
"Are you feeling better" Chan asks coming over to give me a hug but I back away.
He looks at me weirdly "why did you refuse my hug?"
"I still feel sick. I don't want you to catch what I had" I lie.
"Oh" he says and walks away
Good job seungmin you always ruin the mood
Look at how sad you made him
I only refused the hug because I don't want him to feel how fat I am.

Soon after I greet everyone Lucas comes in and he glares at me making me whimper moving back a few steps stumbling feeling dizzy.
I hold onto the chair so I don't fall over.
I look around and thankfully no one notices (or so I thought.)

He starts talking to everyone about the theme of the shoot today but I barely pick up on anything Because I feel so dizzy
After walks out we get to work. I carefully walked to my booth and started Hyunjin makeup.
My hands are shaking so badly.
"Hello Minnie I missed you"
No he didn't
"I missed you too" I respond
They are only being nice to make you feel better
They don't care about you
"Minnie are you ok Hyunjin says snapping me out of my thoughts.
" yes" I lie again.
"Ok then"

Hyunjin and the rest start their photo shoot and luckily we only have this one outfit we need to do today. Then I can go home.

Jisung asked me to come over and talk with him but I said no and made the excuse of me having to clean my booth because I was not here for a week. They believed it.

Before I could realize it I was dragged to the lunch table where jisung was filling up my plate with loads of food
Looking at it makes me sick.

I forced myself to eat some of the food so they wouldn't be suspicious.
I left not a minute later and threw it all up
I feel more sick than before

We all go back to the styling room and finish the look for the last part of the shoot

After the boys where done they asked if I wanted to hang out with them because they where going to eat Fried chicken at the restaurant down the block. I said no.
I don't want to throw up again.
The thought of eating made me flinch a little.

So I lied and told them I had to go and take care of snow. It wasn't a complete lie I did have to feed snow. We said our goodbyes and I sluggishly made my way to my house. I got in and fed snow
I wanted to eat the chicken with them but I need to loose weight. I sigh and trudge to my room only just to fall asleep.

Tuesday

Today was not as bad as yesterday even though I feel weaker than yesterday.

I still feel dizzy
So in my free time I laid in the back room where it is dark.

I didn't talk to anyone today and when jeongin came to get me for lunch I made the excuse that I have a headache and wanted to rest.
I wasn't a lie I'm head was pounding but that was probably because I have not ate and have no energy.

I got the rest of the day off because Felix said I should rest so I went home earlier

I just layed in my bed starting at the ceiling listening to random music then fell asleep at around eleven

Wednesday

Today I still feel sick
I threw up this morning
I am getting sick again
My face is pale and my eyes look dead
The color is drained from my lips for them to only turn a light blueish color
My eye bags are more prominent
My arms and legs more bony but I'm still not skinny enough

I still go to work because I left early yesterday
I also have to walk since I missed the bus

By the time I get there I am panting and out of breath
I take a quick stop to the bathroom to wipe the sweat off and put some light makeup on so no one suspects anything

I go into the styling room and everyone greats me. I put on a fake smile and act happy.
They ask how I'm doing. I lie and say better
I should have known someone would see through my lies.

At lunchtime I lie and tell everyone I will eat in the back room because I want to be alone. They believed it.
I didn't eat anything
I only drank water

After we are done the seven of them asked if I wanted to come over.
Obviously I told them no and said I had to clean my house because I have someone who will visit. They believed it.

I left and went home only to lay and stair at my ceiling just like the night before.

Thursday

Today I wake at one in the morning and rush to the bathroom and throw up
Now I know I'm really sick
I could barely get myself back up off the floor.
I have to call off work.
They won't miss me anyway

So I drag myself downstairs only to feed snow. 
I'm to weak to walk back upstairs
so I lay on the couch sobbing because my body burst so much.
I fall asleep

I should have known they would notice me being distant
I should have thought they realize sooner or later what was happening
I should have been more cautious

Friday

Over the week I managed to loose around 12 more pounds.
I still don't feel skinny
I still have no energy
I still don't eat
I still avoid everyone
I still think I'm annoying
I still think I'm a nuisance
I still am my same old self

I takes me double the amount of time to get to the company today
I should have called off work but I know Lucas will be upset
So I drag myself to work.

I can barely open the doors but as soon as I walk In I am bum boarded by a very worried jeongin
"Where where you yesterday? Are you ok?" He quickly says pulling me into a hug
"Sorry I had guest over that is why I had to clean my house. And yes I'm fine" lies all lies
"Ok I'm just making sure" he ruffles my hair

The day goes smoothly until after lunch

I was resting in the back room again when Felix and jisung walk and start pulling me out of the room saying they need to talk to me.
Them pulling me makes me so dizzy.

When we stop in front of jeongin I quietly whimper and rock back and forth. My vision blurred and goes black
Then the worst happens

I pass out

『1367 words』
——
Here is the end of chapter 10 !!YAY!!
But sadly the book will be coming to an end in a few chapters
I'm so sad
😭
But thank you all for reading such a long chapter
❤️