"You know stores don't stay open forever? They're gonna close before we get there at this rate!" Standing in the doorway, Wilbur yells up the stairs at his friend. "Hurry up, oh my god. You're so slow, Tommy!"
"I AM PUTTING MY SHOES ON WILBUR GIVE ME A FUCKING MINUTE," the teen's rough voice yells from upstairs, clearly sick of his older friend's nagging.
"We've been waiting for more than a minute, Tommy. Phil and Techno are already in the car, hurry up!" The man sees his friend jumping down the stairs, donning his signature red and white baseball tee and some khaki shorts. "Finally."
"Shut up, dickhead. I'm ready now." He runs past the brunet and through the open front door, pulling the blue car door open and jumping in. After a minute, Wilbur joins him in the backseat.
"Jesus Christ, mate. How long does it take to put a pair of bloody shoes on?" Phil looks at the rear-view mirror, staring the other blonde in the eyes.
The boy grins. "Sorry, Phil."
"Yeah, whatever. Can we go now, please?" Techno's voice sounds and the other three burst out laughing as Phil turns the key in the ignition and they set off.
---
"BEEP AT THEM, THEY'RE SO SLOW, FUCK'S SAKE!" Tommy flips the car off as they overtake them, a loud, blaring, drone coming from the red BMW. "Why the hell is it so packed anyway, it's a fuckin- oh wait, it is a Saturday, but still. 'S is bullshit."
"Tommy mate, shut up. We're just trying to find a parking spot, it's not a war." Phil leans forward, squinting to see if there are any free spots. "Guys, keep an eye out for any spots."
---
"Okay, Tommy, you find clothes for Techno, Will for Toms, Tech for me, and I'll look for Will's. We set?"
The boys nod at Phil's words and they separate, hunting outfits for their assigned person.
---
"C'MERE TOMMY!"
"NO!" Tommy screams like a banshee before Wilbur pins him down, yelling for Techno. "I WON'T WEAR THE CAT EARS. PHIL HELP ME!"
Phil watches silently, smiling and laughing to himself, knowing that he probably wouldn't be able to stop them if he tried.
Techno rushes over, wearing a pink skirt, red cloak, and crown and holding a pair of fluffy, bright pink cat ears and Tommy scrambles even more to get out of Wilbur's grip angrily. "THIS IS PAYBACK FOR THE SKIRT, TOMMY!" The blond flails his hands fruitlessly while Techno slides the ears into his blond hair, then goes limp in defeat.
"I'm also wearing a skirt, you massive dickhead," he says as they stand up, but he's grinning widely as he adds, "I'm taking these off."
---
They finally get the other two in their clothes, Phil dressed like his Minecraft skin almost to a t (Techno had somehow managed to find a green and white bucket hat), and Wilbur just dressed like a straight-up e-girl, chains, fishnets, pleated skirt, striped long-sleeve undershirt and all. "Why must you do this to me, Phil? Why have you dressed me like this?"
"You look beautiful, Wil."
"Shut up, Tommy. You're wearing a skirt too. Bitchinnit."
---
E
Are you coming
Hurry up
Wilby Sock
yeah mcdonalds is just taking ages
give us like 5 minutes
E
Hurry up
Wilby
Wilby Sock
do you want your big mac or not
don't ever call me wilby again
E
Okay nerd me and Phil are waiting on the
car
In
Wilby Sock
technobitch
E
Ok Wilby
Wilby Sock
you are a bitch and i wish you the
worst.
E
SOMEONE JUST RECOGNISED PHIL WILBUR HELP
Wilby Sock
WHAT NO
DID THEY RECOGNISE YOU
E
NO
I WENT AWAY WHEN THEY ASKED FOR A PHOTO
WITH PHIL
E
Hurry up
I'm hungry
Bring me my food peasant
Wilby Sock
fuck off
E
Wtf someone just said 'nice
Technoblade cosplay'
---
Finally, Tommy and Wilbur collect their McDonalds order and begin to make their way back to their parking spot.
"Why the fuck did we get so much fuckin' food Wilbur, holy shit. Four whole bags. Why?" Tommy is making a meal out of heaving their grease-packed paper bags to the car, dragging out his words and complaining relentlessly.
Wilbur rolls his eyes and walks over to a tall marble table, setting his boxes and square bags on it. "Fine, Tommy. We can take a rest for a bit if it's that hard for you."
Sighing in relief, Tommy dumps the collection of food containers down, earning a strangled cry from his friend, "stop- you're gonna squash the food! Techno's going to kill you if you bring him a squashed burger."
He scoffs. "I'm such a big man, not even the mighty Technoblade can fight me. I'll squish all the burgers I bloody well want." He goes to grab Techno's burger box aggressively, but Wilbur pulls his hand away before he can actually ruin his friend's lunch.
---
E
Yo where are you it's been like half an
hour
Wilby Sock
tommy tried to squash your burger and i
saved it be grateful
E
He did WHAT
Wilby Sock
HELLO TECHNOBLAE THIS IS TOMMY
ISDID NOTHINF OF THE SORT
E
Tommy I swear to god.
Wilby Sock
I THOGUHT YOU WERE AN ATTHEIST
THECHBJIOBLAFE M
E
Tommy
Wilby Sock
tommy took my fucking phone
E
I gathered
Wilby Sock
PENIS
E
Hello Tommy
Wait where are you
Are you even coming over to the car
Wilby Sock
YES WE AR EE ON OUT WAY RECHNOBLADE
Wilby Sock
it's wilbur
the fucking child took my phone again
E
I don't care who you are hurry up
---
Childinnit
HELLO TECHNOBLADE I JUST WANTED TO SAY I
AM NOT A CHILD I AM A BIG MAN
TECHNOBITCH
Sure Tommy
Hurry up small child
Childinnit
your glasses are shit
you're shit
fuck you
TECHNOBITCH
Whatever just hurry up
Childinnit
there's a reason your name is
TECHNOBITCH in my phone
999 words
YOU ARE READING
'i don't have anywhere else to go.' - a sleepy boys inc story
Fanfiction"Tommy? What- it's 2 in the morning-" Phil is shaken from his half awake daze at the sight of Tommy, on his doorstep, looking like he's been through hell and back. "Hi. I-I don't have anywhere else to go. Can I stay-" Phil interrupts him with a soft...
