020.

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author's note

I'm not sure how it looks from your perspective, but, for some reason I can't figure out, chapter 19 keeps disappearing from its proper place. Instead, it pops up after chapter 21 no matter what I do. At least that's what I see when I open SUPERCUT on my phone. So, if the problem exists outside of my account, too, please, don't mind jumping forward and back again until I manage to fix it.

🌼

Marianne has no right to feel as though Gilbert Blythe owed her anything - she never had - and yet she cannot help but fell somewhat betrayed by the lack of a goodbye.

But there are other problems, which need taking care of, and the girl knows it. Feeling bad because of something so ordinary would be more than unthoughtful, especially when there is Matthew's health, as well as the future of Green Gables, that she should truly worry about.

It's been hours since both her and Anne first learned about the Cuthberts loosing money, and not even from the siblings themselves, but rather through an awful rumor at school. And then, upon returning back to the house, they heard their argument, and saw Matthew collapse; the image of his knees giving up beneath the man still haunting Marianne's imagination, and the words of the doctor echoing in her ears.

It was a very frightening sight and little less frightening diagnosis.

It's no strange that she cannot sleep tonight, endlessly twisting and turning in her bed, unable to find the right position. Perhaps there isn't one, in a situation like this; she can remember how petrified she had been unless Marilla checked whether Matthew was breathing.

All three of them must remember. It would be hard not to when the memory is haunting their minds each time they close their eyes.

So when a sound of someone's feet meeting the floor outside her room reaches her ears, Marianne doesn't try to ignore it. She doesn't even hesitate before throwing on her robe and stepping into the corridor, the walls already lit enough by the lamp in Anne's hand.

There's no need to speak at all, as though there was some silent agreement between the two girls, walking down the stairs side by side; Marianne doesn't even flinch when she feels Anne's fingers linking with her own. It's nice to feel assured that she's not alone in all this.

And there's Marilla, her head bent over various pieces of paper and her brows furrowed both from worry and difficulty in understanding. As they step down, she looks up from the documents, and fails to hide all the insecurity behind her eyes.

"You two should be asleep."

"So should you."

Marilla must know that, no matter the words leaving her lips, both Anne and Marianne wouldn't go back upstairs. It's not even worth trying to convince them, so she allows the girls to sit down, each at her side, and Marianne could swear she catches a glimpse of a small smile on the woman's face - one stained both worry and gratitude.

"I wish I had a head for numbers."

"I'm a dunce at geometry, but I'm pretty good at math now. Which part is troublesome?" asks Anne.

Marianne's heart drops as she hears about the high rate of interest and short payback schedule. She's never given any thought to the prospect of any trouble arising from the loan - to be honest, she's never given Matthew's arrangement with the bank any thought at all. Right now, she can't even remember if she had ever shown any interest to the matter of the costs of her staying at Green Gables. All the arrangements, at first concerning both her and Edward, were made while everything was clouded by grief... Does he send the money to Avonlea every now and then or do the Cuthbert siblings have to pay for everything?

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