Liana's Ship (#ONC 2021)

11. Liana: Almost, but not quite entirely unlike tea

Dr Zan stabbed the red, oblong fruit with his fork.

It fell off and landed with a splat, right back on the plate. The resulting splashes landed on his lab clothes. I'd never seen someone view a tomato with suspicion before but I gave him the benefit of the doubt. It was likely his first time eating the fruit. I found out they grew them on the ship, for the human passengers but had never tried them themselves.

Were tomatoes toxic to Xerans? I hadn't thought about that. Thinking about things had been low on my priorities. Not just since I had been on the ship. Since I never stayed in a job long enough to make long term plans.

We were sitting in the part of Thera called The Earthfood Eating House. I figured Xerans either literally translated or just lacked imagination when it came to giving names. It wasn’t just the name, it was a gloomy place, all badly lit with white tiles and plastic like chairs. Someone had made the effort decorating the tables with red and white chequered plastic cloth. They shouldn't have bothered. It reminded me of the greasy spoon the losers of a popular business TV show went before being fired by an egomaniacal billionaire. I took a sip of my tea and winced. They tried, they almost got it right. Tea was too demanding to grow on this ship I surmised.

"Almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea." I said, under my breath and chuckled.

"What are you saying that is so amusing?" Zan said, the tomato falling off his fork again. More splats. The coat needed a wash or whatever eerie thing Thera did to clean clothes. I dreaded to think what that involved. 

"It's from an Earth book," I answered, "it's about a man who escapes from earth when it's blown up. He can't get a decent cup of tea, no matter how hard the computer tried to replicate it."

"I thought only a few humans had left Earth before us?” He said, “despite your poor decisions made by your race, The Earth is still standing."

"It's made up, fiction, for entertainment," I sighed, "haven't you read any Earth books?"

"Only the essential facts," he put the fork down on the table, "like which foods are edible. How am I supposed to eat this wretched fruit without ruining all my suits in the process?"

I went over to his side of the table. "Here let me," I picked up the knife and fork, "you've got to use this,” I said, showing the knife,” to cut off a piece," I sliced a small amount of the tomato, put it on the fork and handed it to him. I was tempted to feed it to him like a small child. With my relief he took it from my hand. 

"This, toe-maht-toe," he pronounced it, "is more agreeable than I thought it would be. I cannot see  how this will cure my hang-over."

"It probably won't, but the tomato fills you up and stops that hollow feeling in your stomach. Also it has vitamins, you lose a few of them when you drink to excess."

"Hollow feeling?" He said puzzled, the tomato had gone and he was looking at the toast with curiosity. This doctor was completely clueless. Was he not interested about Earth or just too engrossed in his work?

"The slice of beige in your hand is toast." He gave me a blank stare, "it's cooked bread from Earth, made of grass, grains, seeds if you want to be technical."

"I know what bread is!” He said, “I don't understand why you would cook it again? It has already been cooked!"

"Never mind," I sighed, fed up, "Leave it, you’ve probably eaten enough for now. We should start working soon."

"There's nothing to do, Liana." He said, picking up the toast and giving it a tentative nibble. He threw it back on the plate,  "this toast is not good tasting, human food is most bland." He pushed the plate away, the white thread like tendrils moved over the leftovers, dissolving it. That never happened at the loser cafe.

"I walked past the observation deck and it was a state.” I said, trying not to look at the dissolving mass that had formerly been known as breakfast. It was alright for him hiding in his lab, hell he probably had a sleeping bag in there. “You’ve been hiding in your lab so long you probably haven’t seen the state of this place lately. Others are not going to want to date if the ship is a state. It’s generally good for wellbeing to have green, no I suppose you call them red spaces? Whatever, this place needs sprucing up, is what I’m trying to say.”

"What's the point? The programme has failed.” He said, “at least you have a home to go back to. You say I’m ignorant and unobservant? Look around Liana.” He got up and left me in the crap cafe.

 Fine, so my new boss was more depressing than an entire Radiohead back catalogue, no big deal, right? A sense of uneasiness washed over me, a tidal wave of fear that threatened to rise up through my throat. Then it hit me.

The cafe was empty, nobody in it unless you counted the self service area. A place that should be full of hungry passengers was almost deathly quiet. Had I met people on the ship? Yes, Betalaina and Dr Grumpy, no exchanges beyond pleasantries with the other people. 

The people, I thought, I couldn't figure it out but the more I wandered the more I felt something was not quite right. 

No, I was imagining it, don’t be ridiculous, Liana,I told myself, Just do some gardening and you’ll forget about it. 

Yes, nothing a little light pruning can’t cure.