In the factory, Michael had everything a person without ambitions could ask for, everything but peace of mind. The place was dry, warm, and dirty and people miserable, just as they were supposed to be. He could listen to radio warnings about Russian misinformation, buy drugs every time he wanted to or feel sorry for himself. Flexible hours meant he could not even be late. Tea and coffee were free of charge and the kitchen big enough to accommodate up to six chronic moaners at a time.
He worked at a large bench designed to assembly windows, where his supervisor instructed him to glue together small, black, plastic elements. Once connected, they formed slightly bigger, black, plastic elements. It was a simple, therapeutic job for people with low IQ scores and a highlight of Michael's professional career. It required no skill and no enthusiasm which was just fine with Michael since his enthusiasm was at the record low and the only recognizable skill he possessed was an ability to multitask when evacuating bowels. Evacuating bowels did not require enthusiasm, just common sense to be in the right place at the right time. Michael was lucky and he knew that. It was not easy to find a good, therapeutic job in the marketplace where even a kitchen porter was required to have previous experience and relevant qualifications.
No one cared how many plastic elements he produced for as long as he produced some. He was allowed to work at his own pace, undisturbed and untroubled by anyone, not even the bullies on the other side of the walkway. He had fingers covered in glue and enough time on his hands to contemplate his perfect record. He was sacked from every company he had ever worked for. It was already a week since his last dismissal and he was slowly getting used to his new surroundings. The first signs were very encouraging.
Rosanto was a family-run business boarded by a sprawling complex of the psychiatric hospital on one side and the stinking conglomerate of a noisy recycling center on the other. The four-story building of the psychiatric ward for the most difficult cases was so close to a cycling alley separating the two properties that the staff in the office could see shadows of the patients lurking behind the ward's curtains and occasionally hear strange howling sounds coming out of it. The recycling center was hidden behind a high fence and a row of tall Aspen trees and from a distance looked very unsuspicious for as long as the wind blew the right way round.
It was not a splendid neighborhood but one which allowed the business to grow and expand without the need for costly relocation. Thanks to Chairman's energy and business acumen it became a reputable establishment and even the owners of the recycling center started looking over their high fence with envy. Build on the solid foundation of fairness, hard work, and continuous professional development, the company strived to help every employee reach their full potential. In recognition of its efforts, it was awarded the "Investors in People" standard. Soon after "Queen's authorized supplier". The right to display royal warrants followed. When the time came to cut down on the dangerous levels of CO2 emissions the chairman, an enthusiast of "The Blue Planet" updated the company's website with a characteristically pragmatic statement: "We do everything we can to protect and enhance the natural world".
Michael did not have anything against enhancing. It seemed like something he always wanted to do. The full potential was also fine. He honestly thought investing in him was a good idea. The fact Jesus loved him gave him the strength to take continuous professional development seriously. Every time he accidentally glued his fingers like an irresponsible minor he immediately separated them from each other like a surgeon specializing in dealing with birth defects. The more he glued his fingers the better the surgeon he became. His progress went largely unnoticed, which was another good sign. Michael started to believe that his dream could come true.
It was a very simple, American dream. Start from the bottom, dream about the top and stay at the bottom. In order to achieve it, all Michael had to do was to make a good first impression. He promised himself to keep his mouth shut and not to demonstrate to his potential employers that he had any interest in their business or visited their website. He bet his last penny, his would-be employers were not that much interested in his interest of their business. It was their business to look after their business and it was Michael's business to mind his own business, be polite and make a good first impression. The key to making a good first impression was to pretend there was nothing wrong with people, laugh at their jokes and repeat the same jokes back to them so they could laugh back at something they were familiar with. It was a very good game plan. The only one Michael had.
On his right-hand side, behind the racking full of window frames, was Ron's infamous kingdom. Ron had a heart made of gold, eyes looking in two different directions, and attention deficit disorder. The junk his bench was covered with could be seen from outer space, but he claimed there was no junk on his bench at all. His favorite subject of conversation was: anal sex. As a purist, he believed porn should be as dirty as possible. He was a dedicated family man in love with a porn star. It was a tragic love. She did not like anal sex.
Right behind Michael, on the other side of the walkway separating the two teams, were the sash makers. One was a bodybuilder and knew everything about dopamine and the other was a hooligan and knew everything about cocaine. They were busy celebrating diversity by throwing random jabs in a face of the only black guy in the factory. In front of Michael worked Jason and right behind Jason, Tony. The former was short skinny and energetic and the latter was tall skinny and energetic. They were the best friends, the best at annoying Michael. Their favorite subject of conversation was Jason, Jason's OCD, and Jason's first date with his future wife. Tony badly wanted to prove who was the funniest guy in the factory and took no time in proving it was him. He has had perfected his act to the smallest detail and struck to his script with very little deviation. It was very funny, very witty, and very repetitive. Jason himself demanded to hear it over and over again.
- Come on, say it – he persisted with a smile on his narrow, canoe-like face complemented with sparse bits of random facial hair.
- Come on, Jason, you have heard this so many times – Tony chuckled gleefully. Empowered by his new auditorium he winked at Michael a few times.
- Come on say it – pleaded Jason. Tony knew how to play his cards. He was an ex-sailor, turned factory operative, who used to be fat but had changed his mind. He could read his best friend like an open book even though he never read a book in his life.
- Come on – Jason persisted.
- Oh, ok – Tony sighted with pretended tiredness and enthusiastically went on mocking Jason for carving a heart on a bench with his and his future wife's initials on it. Bursting with laughter, Jason vigorously denied such a thing had ever happened just to find out there were also two pigeons sitting on a branch of a nearby tree, with a ribbon in their beaks: "you are the love of my life".
- It's ridiculous – Jason admitted. - No such thing had ever taken place.
Hewas as happy as Larry and put all the cups back home in order, label to thefront and rear to the left. – Tony finished his story, proud he made his bestfriend laugh again.
- Michael was not that excited. Listening to the same story over and over again wore thin on him though he pretended otherwise. He could not imagine the level of happiness so deep and overwhelming to make him put the only cup he owned in a rented room, label to the front and rear to the left. But he could imagine that one day he may find Tony's story about Jason's date with his future wife very funny. It was a scary proposition and Michael would rather run away the instant he had somewhere to run, but there was nowhere to run but the toilet, and Michael send his atheistic prayers to Jesus who loved him and in whom Michael did not believe in to get full-time employment before Tony and Jason would find out that he thought they were full of shit to the point of overflowing.
