That Night

Chapter One- The Beginning

You know when you think you've got the world by it's tail and you are unstoppable and nothing can hurt you. The teenage years where you are stretching the boundaries and  you can't be defined as a child or an adult. The point where you think you know what's best for you and you don't want any guidance or adult intervention. It was at this point in my life where this tale begins.

It was the summer of 1984 and I was 15 years old. It was the summer of transition of moving from a school and friends that had been the main focus of my life for the last  4 years to a boarding school two hours away. The tradition of going to this school for the last two years of my high school education was unquestioned. Everyone in my family had done it. In fact, my adoptive parents had been on staff there after they had graduated from high school and then university. From an early age it was just known that I would go there and become an alumni of this religious high school. So it was the summer that I was saying good bye to the old ways and embracing a new path with more independence and responsibilities. 

My friend group was  small but it was comprised of approximately 10 girls and 10 guys. We were known as the peer group that was smart, athletic, and trustworthy. The teachers liked us and in general believed in us moving on to great things past our high school years. We never really got into trouble at home or school. We were the leaders of our peers, the captains of the teams, and the students on the honor roll at school. The core of my group was myself along with 3 other girls. We spent time together as a solid 4, and then we also paired off into two more intimate couples with sleepovers, phone calls, and shared interests and activities. My best friend Lin was so accepting and supportive of me. She gave me confidence when I wasn't strong and made me feel like a part of the larger friend group when I felt like I was on the outer fringe, At times I felt like an imposter because I wasn't as smart and capable as all the rest. But I had a good personality and my caring with a bit of humor helped bring me into the group. 

Lin and I would show up, unite with Jo and Rocki and the four of us would join in with the larger group. Those three always seemed to have a boyfriend or have somebody interested in them when they were between boyfriends. I wasn't as fortunate in the romance department and had recently just began a relationship with a boy that was from another peer group at our school. But I liked him, so over the last 6 months my friends had become accepting of him. It was rare that people dated outside of their peer group in our town. So in reality I wasn't really 100% accepted by his group when we were together and the same could be said of my peer group about him. But I didn't care because I liked him and was happy to call him my first official boyfriend.

I was the youngest child in my family and the only girl of the 4 children. My father was a minister and his name and reputation was very important to him. People looked up to him and looked to him for guidance. He was a pillar in the community and I was acutely aware of the fact that I had to be very careful not to soil his good name. I was adopted by them when they decided after several miscarriages that it wasn't in the cards for them to have a biological daughter. My mom loved and accepted me, but my father always seemed distant and not concerned about creating a loving bond with me. I believe he only participated in the adoption process to appease a desire in my mom to have a baby girl. He was content with his three sons and since they were truly his blood he felt he could bend and mold them to fit his narrative, but I always seem to challenge or disappoint him. 

This completes the brief summary of my life at 15. There were changes in my future that I was excited to embrace. I was sad to leave my life in Tulipstone, but very excited to be out from under the controlling thumb of my father. Given all this information, it is easy to see why the next part of my tale was planned and unfolded. But  the execution of it and completion of it did not have the desired outcome. The outcome in fact, had huge consequences that changed me forever and left a huge scar on my life and those who were a part of my life.