08 | peanut-butter

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⋆ ——————— sitara ⋮ ⋆

I WAS DRAINED. I threw my bag on my bed and pulled out some comfy pants to change into. As soon as I was changed, I put on a face pack and jumped onto my bed, leaning on the headboard. 

Two days back, I was casually discussing my work with Shaurya, how many communities in India don't even know what a pad is and use whatever they find instead of it. And how many women can't afford it because it is expensive. Our organization was solely founded to battle the unawareness and women's inability to afford them and supply organic and cheap pads to them. Four years and several outlets branching across India later, we were expanding further. 

But then, Shaurya raised a good point. He'd said, "I understand that you started out as an all women organization to help other women. You say you want to normalize periods. Shouldn’t you be employing males as well to break that stigma? You are confining periods as a matter solely pertaining to women by employing only women, don't you think?" 

His take on it was an eye-opener. I took this opinion to the office and turned the meeting into a chaos of opinions for and against it. Some wanted the company to function as an all-women firm and felt that if men were employed, it may reflect as if we women can't do well without men (which felt stupid to me). Some agreed with what I said. There were endless arguments on the opinion and we didn't come to a conclusion in the end. 

But Aisha had said it was a really good point. My other friends agreed as well. That was a little comforting. On top of all this, there was a selection of employees who are to go to London soon for setting up the new branch. I was chosen. I wanted to go because I've never been anywhere out of India but my wedding was still undecided. I didn't want the dates to clash. 

Or leave Shaurya for almost a month. 

The London thing was in February and it was December now. I had a few weeks to decide and confirm my choice with the management. 

I grabbed my phone and checked to see if Shaurya had left messages but there were none. I frowned. The good morning text I sent remained unanswered, more importantly, unseen. 

I called him. The ring went on for a long time until I was sure he wasn’t going to pick up. When I was about to hang up, the call connected. “Shaurya, what the hell happened to you?” I asked.

“Sorry, I’m not feeling well,” He murmured, his voice beaten and worn out. 

I sat upright immediately. “Why didn’t you tell me?” I demanded, already rushing to the bathroom. I put the call on speaker. 

“After Ma passed away, I had no one to call whenever I got sick. It became a habit now,” He said and I stopped splashing water on my face. 

“Well, I’m here now. You better make it a habit to call me whenever anything happens,” I said, scrubbing the face pack from my face. 

I heard a weak chuckle from his side. “Do you need anything from the medical shop?”

“I’m having a bad headache and I’ve been vomiting a lot,” he mumbled.

“Okay, just keep the door unlocked and go to sleep. I’ll be there,” I said into the phone and hung up. I hastily wiped my face, took a change of clothes and threw in basic toiletries into a small bag. 

“Ma!” I called, stepping out of my room.

Aiyoo Rama, don’t shout like I am two galaxies away from you,” Ma said, glaring at me before going back to watching the TV serial she loves. "I didn't hear what this girl said to her. And now she is crying. It was a very important scene."

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