Casual // Jesse Klaver x Rob Jetten ENG // RESSE on tiktok

Chapter VIII

The next morning I wake up with a sore neck and even though we've spend a good amount of money on this couch when we moved to this place, it's not comfortable to sleep on. My entire back and forehead is covered in sweat. I get up from the couch and check the time on my phone. 5:39 a.m., this must be a joke. I walk over to the kitchen and pour myself a glass of tap water and drink it in one sip. Nightmares really do make a human thirsty.

My biggest fear at the moment is Jolein taking the kids away from me, and them growing up without their dad. I was raised by a single mother after my dad left. The last thing I want for my three sons, is to be raised by just their mother. Jolein would and could never do that to me, she knows how it affected me as a person. But at this moment, everything is possible.

I place the now empty glass on the counter top and I go with my fingers through my wet, greasy hair. I can't really shower at this time without waking my family up, so it'll do for now. I stare at the ceiling and take a breath before walking into the living room again. I fold the blanket and put the pillow on top it. Although, I am still very tired I don't feel like sleeping again. The bags I left on the floor are still in the hallway so I go to get them and grab my laptop.

As much as I love my job, my friends and family would consider me a workaholic, I try my best not to miss out on family time. And when I do work from home, I just go to my home office and close the doors. But since my wife or the kids aren't awake yet, I just sit down on the couch with the laptop on my lap. Exactly, what it is made for.

I go through my personal parliament email account and I have received tons of emails yesterday. Loads of emails are from people who are calling me gay and/or a f*ggot. Obviously, I feel hurt but not in the way that it affects me. It hurts me in the way that the Netherlands still isn't as progressive as we all think. Although, these emails are pathetic , I don't feel like I should play a victim because I will never understand what LGBTQA+ people have to go through every single day.

I've always liked the idea of keeping people up to date with an email. That's why I send an email to all the people who are subscribed to our newsletter every now and then. I don't really do statements, because I feel like they don't feel personal. Although, I usually let an intern or an assistant double-check the emails I write, but I won't do it right now. I take a deep breath and start typing.

For some reason, this email feels very natural to type and unlike Rob's statement, I feel like mine is very personal. By writing from my point of view and using "I" instead of "Jesse", I hope it helps.

By the time I'm finished it is 6:11 a.m. and I decide to schedule the mail. Maybe 7:45 a.m. is a nice time, it can't be too early or too late. Thankfully I haven't released my statement yesterday evening, because otherwise it would've been in the newspapers today. I close my laptop and sit on the edge of the couch. I take a deep breath and run my hand through my greasy hair once again.

It is still very early but I feel dirty so I go upstairs to take a shower and get ready for the day. My showers are short, and efficient. No need to stay in the shower for longer than needed, because you'll waste a lot of water. Even letting the water run while it warms up, is a waste of water.
When I'm ready I go downstairs again to make myself an easy breakfast and watch the news. The time flies by and I feel it's time to wake up the two oldest boys for school.

—

I'm sitting downstairs with the two boys, when I notice it's past 7:45. My email has been send to thousands of people and it's only a matter of time before people will react to that on either social media or in my email inbox. As much as I want to check my inbox, I don't. I tell the boys to put on their coats and grab their lunchboxes out of the fridge so I can bring them to school. I write a little sticky note for Jolein for when she wakes up.