Eruri Oneshots

Oneshot #21

"Bisexuality."

———
Erwin has learned there is always a stigma no matter who he is with.

Those he thought were friends told him to pick a side, told him he was 'essentially straight' or was 'basically gay'. For a long time, he refused to date, not wanting to prove any of them right. But he was scared, too, wondering if any partners would mind with how he identified.

Even now, having dated a hefty handful of men and women, there have been a few who judged. A few who asked him to pick a side, a few who were just not okay with it. He's learned to let go, but no matter who he dates, they all seem to have their insecurities about it all. They don't verbalize it, but it was the small things, like the cringe they did when he found someone of the opposite gender attractive, or how they reacted when he would grow comfortable into more fluid clothing.

It made him self-conscious, afraid to tell those he met he was bisexual, so he used more umbrella terms to ease their conscience. However, it didn't matter, because the truth always came out one way or another. Then he was accused of being a liar, and yada, yada, it never ended well, even after he tried to explain himself.

So, he stopped trying to explain himself, tried to convince himself he wasn't bisexual, just fluid, and decided that until he was sure, he wouldn't tell who he was with who he actually was, so used straight or gay, depending on who he was with.

But then the universe enters a guy named Levi in his life, and suddenly all those walls start to break.

It's slow because Levi takes it slow, but it benefits Erwin the most because he likes Levi so much that he needs to work through his feelings fast. It's after the first month does Erwin realize he loves Levi, and that terrifies him. He knows as soon as he reveals he is bisexual, Levi is going to leave.

He almost debates not telling Levi, but that thought makes his chest constrict—lying to a man he loves so much and trusts more than anyone—so almost year after their first meeting, Erwin sits Levi down on the couch, preparing for the hardest breakup he's going to go through.

"Levi, I need to tell you something. I've been holding this off for a while, but you need to know now. You are so amazing and I hope you can forgive me for this," Erwin says. Levi's eyebrows furrow.

"What the hell are you going with this?" He asks. "If your sentence ends with 'please forgive me', I'm just a little nervous. Did you get someone pregnant?"

Erwin blinks. "No, no, how could I get anyone else pregnant when they're not you?"

"I don't have a womb, but continue," Levi says. He props his arm up, leans his head on his fist and waits for Erwin to continue.

It takes a minute, but then he says, "I'm bisexual."

Levi blinks. "Okay..."

This is how it starts. The slow "okay", then as it sinks in and they think about it, it turns into the "so, you lied to me?", and then it blows up from there with the accusations of mistrust and cheating.

When Erwin doesn't continue, his nerves forming a sheen of sweat on his forehead that Levi thinks is totally unnecessary, Levi speaks himself.

"And that matters because...?" Levi prompts.

"We—Well, I, uh, it shouldn't... but I—I lied to you, I told you I was gay, but I'm not," Erwin stutters.

"Well, you were never as fruity as I was," Levi says with a shrug.

"'Fruity'?" Erwin asks, surprised at how this talk is going. Levi nods.

"The way you look at Meghan Fox is a little less fruity than what a gay person would," Levi says. "I mean, we're going to to talk about the fact that you felt like you needed to lie to me about it, but we also need to talk about why the fuck you're tearing up right now."