Chapter Five: I Saw You

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A/N: yeah not really a lot going on in this one tbh, though we are gonna get some more Alyssa/Damira content, cause I love writing them

A little over a week had passed since my late-night rendezvous with Beatrix, and the inescapable boredom had begun creeping back.

I was laying on my bed, staring at the ceiling. I was supposed to be reading this math textbook, but I couldn't concentrate. Every time I tried to focus, it was like the words began swimming in front of my eyes, like they were going to jump off the page and run away.

I never thought I would say it, but I missed school.

There used to be a school down in the town next to us, but it was basically torn apart by a tornado during a particularly violent storm, only a few weeks after I'd arrived at the orphanage and begun to attend there.

It had been really scary when it was happening, when they hurried us all down to the basement to wait it out. At least I think it had been. I didn't really remember anything that happened that day. It was all kind of a blur. Apparently you blocked out some traumatic memories or something. But after it was over, I didn't really care. No one had died, and I had never liked school anyway, so it wasn't a huge loss.

It had been a hurricane, which shocked everyone because we'd never gotten one of those before. The top of the school had been completely destroyed, and there was no money to rebuild it, so they gave us a bunch of cheap textbooks and told us to study at home. No one really did, though. So if we ever went back to school we would probably all fail.

I rolled over on my bed, laying my head on my pillow, and closed my eyes. I could feel the exhaustion in my bones, tugging at my eyelids. I hadn't slept well in days, I had been woken by nightmares. They were so vivid when I was having them, but after I woke up, it took about a day and then I forgot them.

I could only remember some of the ones I had that night, most of it was just a blur. My mom had been lying bleeding on the ground of the supermarket, after being trampled by the frantic crowd. I had run to help her, and when I reached her side, her head had turned up towards me abruptly, and she had grabbed the front of my shirt, pulling me down to her level. She had been trying to tell me something, but she could barely whisper, and I couldn't hear it.

I knew some of those kinds of dreams came from memories, but that one didn't. I was at home when she died, hiding in my room, while I listened to the chaos unfold outside. I hid in our house for two days until the social services had come.

I sighed and rolled over on my back again. I was so bored. I understood more than ever why Alyssa was always so desperate to leave.

There were some things I could do. I could go to the library, but there almost were only history and nonfiction books there, and the librarian kept walking around and checking what people were doing, not to mention listening in on everyone's conversations, then kicking them out for talking.

I could go down to the pond, but I had come back from there just twenty minutes ago, when I knew I couldn't avoid doing just a bit of studying any longer. But I still hadn't, no one could procrastinate quite like I could.

I could go see what Alyssa was doing. She was probably hanging out with her sister, or down by the forest, where some of the kids went to smoke or drink or whatever it was that went on down there. I usually tried to avoid all that, I heard too often about kids getting caught.

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