Alone

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I ducked my head down against the assault of the rain. Though my hood had been drawn, the wind had forced the rain in all directions. It had started as tiny droplets of chilly water kissing my face, but by the time I had walked halfway to Magnus's apartment, my hair, face and throat were drenched. Then again, all of me was soaked, but all I could really feel was the icy tickle of sneaky droplets of rain slithering down the back of my neck. The sensation left me unnerved. Of course, the rain wasn't the only reason for my feelings of unease.

I hadn't seen or heard from Alec in days. I hadn't heard from anyone, for that matter. Not Magnus. Not JC. It was as if the second Alec sent me away, my connection will all of them had been severed. A rope that had been thrown to me had been suddenly cut, and now I was frantically trying to regain a grip on the rope of my old life. But my hold on my old life was slipping. I found myself constantly thinking about the others. When I tried to distract myself by going on a hunt, I found myself glancing over my shoulder more frequently than usual. The feeling of vulnerability and exposure was incessant. More than that, the realization that I was alone, a thought that I had once paid no heed to, bothered me. I felt...incomplete.

The downpour of rain ceased as I stepped under the canopy of Magnus's apartment building. I breathed a sigh of relief and pulled my hood back, shaking my head and sending droplets of water flying from my sopping hair. I continued forward and reached my hand out for the door, but a voice stopped me.

"Didn't expect to see you back here."

I turned and found JC standing at the curb, rain dripping from his silver hair. He seemed at ease standing with a slight slouch and with his hands in his pockets, but his narrowed eyes said otherwise. My showing up had obviously irritated him. I bristled defensively. I hadn't even looked at him. If he hadn't said anything I never would have noticed him standing there. What had I done to agitate him?

"What are you doing out here?" I queried.

JC stuck up his nose as if he did not intend to answer me, but finally he replied, "Magnus and Alec were getting...rambunctious, so I decided to give them some privacy."

"Oh."

I took a step back from the door, disappointed. What was I supposed to do now? Go home? Wait outside? Going inside was out of the question. Interrupting that would not get me into their good graces.

"Seriously, Jace, why did you come back?" JC questioned icily.

I stumbled over my words as it dawned on me that I did not even know the answer to that question. "I--I don't know."

JC rolled his eyes. "Oh my God. So what? You have one little bonding moment with Alec and now you're obsessed with him?"

"No!"

The rising of my voice brought a smirk to JC's face. "I see."

His tone told me that he did not believe me.

"It's not like that," I said firmly. "I'm done with working solo. I need someone to have my back. And I think we can find the bastard that's smoking Shadowhunters if we put our heads together."

That obliterated JC's grin. "Alec is my partner, Jace. There's no room for you. You'll only make us weaker. You'll throw us off balance. Alec can't have my back if he's busy saving your ass."

My eyes narrowed. "You want Alec all to yourself. Now who's obsessed with him?"

"Alec has been claimed by Magnus," JC went on, unfazed, "but he's still my partner. You have nothing. You have no one."

His words sliced through me, but JC did not seem pleased by his evoking my pain. His expression was difficult to read. At first I thought I saw pity, but the coldness in his dark eyes betrayed the existence of something else...Revulsion?

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