When I'm with you/ SunaxFem!Reader

Chapter 8

CHAPTER 8

Chapter based off on: The Rain by Rejjie Snow

August 19th, 2019

Time: 3:23 AM

Staring at the ceiling, (Y/N) had a million thoughts surging through her head. She hadn't been able to sleep due to the nagging question that kept popping up in her head every so often. Should she allow herself to be vulnerable in the hands of Suna? Should she take that risk without knowing the future effects it may have on her life?

That thought haunted her to the point where her eyes began to water. A small tear falling on the side of her cheek. She sat up and began to silently sob as she buried her face into her knees.

She was truly scared to let someone into her life again. She already knew the pain of accepting and loving someone so deeply in her life, before they were gone. It wasn't their fault though, life happens and unexpected situations cause heartbreak. The thing is though, she didn't want to have to go through that excruciating pain again.

Caring for someone so deeply only brought joy in her life. The feeling of someone returning that feeling only made her heart flutter. But eventually that feeling could be crushed in a matter of time. She didn't know what would happen to her if she had to relive that pain again. It broke her before and it might break her completely if it were to happen.

Lost in the negative thoughts, she so badly yearned to be beside him. He would always know the right things to say to her whenever she was down or had a lot on her mind.

"I need help, I don't know what to do", the girl silently said.

Getting up she decided to try and ease her emotions with one of the only things that could calm her down, music. She plugged in her earbuds before laying flat down on her bed again. Finding her playlist she clicked shuffle. A quiet song began to play as she stared up to the ceiling. She began to think about the situation she was in again. Her past demons were only telling her to say no and accept the fact that she was better off alone. But a small part of her was telling her to take this opportunity and grasp it close to her.

That small part of her replayed the moments she had spent with Suna. Only having met him three days ago, she had already grown a small attachment to the boy. The way he was often clumsy made her laugh. The way he would look at her whenever she was doing something small made the butterflies in her stomach flutter. The way he would complain to her about being so straightforward made her smile. She enjoyed the small things Suna did in the short amount of time they've spent together that she couldn't help but smile.

(Y/N) so badly wanted to experience these things first hand again, but she couldn't fully push the nagging voice in her head away.

Still lost in thought, The Rain by Rejjie Snow began softly playing through her earbuds.

(Y/N) was indecisive, and couldn't come up with a straight answer to what she wanted. She still had some tears streaming down her face.

"Just one of them days when the rain falls down
Wash my tears away, Father in heaven, won't you come rain down? Wash my tears away, yeah-ah".

Losing herself in the lyrics of the song she thought to herself, 'Do I want to be happy? Would he want this for me?'

She rubbed her eyes, and grabbed a tissue from the tissue box near her bed and wiped the last remaining tears in her eyes. Looking at the palm of her hands, she felt a sudden burst of courage. It felt like someone was trying to send her a message that she should take the risk, reassuring her that everything would be fine.