chapter 11

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"Joon," Joon was woken up by a soft shake on his shoulder, "wake up. It's already seven." 

Joon groaned at the stiff pain in the neck as he straightened up, opening his eyes up to realise that he had fallen asleep on the couch. He rubbed his neck and stood up, the thin duvet pooling around his feet. 

"I've made breakfast. Go and wash yourself up." Joon's mother looked up at him and gave him a kind smile. He was just visiting for his nephew's birthday, and ended up staying in his parent's house for the entire weekend. 

"Okay," he said tiredly. 

With a small nod, Joon's mother turned and left the room, heading back to the stairs. Joon groaned as he walked across the room to the bathroom, and pulled out some fresh towels for a shower. He stood before the mirror, clutching the edges of the sink. 

Three months. It had been that long since he hadn't seen Cyan. There was no significant change in his life, except he was now a Section Chief instead of a Team Leader. But there was nothing in his life to look forward to. 

Such was life. 

_______

"So, any plans for marriage?" Cyan's sister-in-law asked at the breakfast table, earning a discreet glare from her husband. "What?" She huffed. "I am just curious. He works in a big company, there must be someone." 

Cyan's brother and his wife were both professors at the University. They had two children, one in middle school, the second one in grade school. Perfect example of an exemplary married couple. It was what Joon's parents expected of him. 

"I would be glad if our son brought anyone home," Joon's mother said, her eyes moistened. 

What an over acting. Who was the one who forbade me from seeing anyone my entire youth? 

"Seriously, are you seeing anyone?" 

Conversations like those did not faze Joon before. He would simply brush them off and say, I don't have the time right now. But this time, it felt different. His own family felt like a bunch of foreigners. 

"Actually I am, I confessed to someone earlier this year. Got turned down." 

Everyone kept their chopsticks down and looked at Joon, their silences demanding heavy answers. But Joon didn't say a word more, continued to eat, and his family was forced to fill the awkward silence in for themselves. 

"What a shame, she doesn't realise how precious Joon is." 

"Don't worry, someone will come for you." 

"Don't give up brother, fighting!" 

Joon licked his teeth and decided to come clean. "It's a he, actually, and he has a five year old daughter. Obviously, he is going to turn me down." 

The enthusiasm on the faces of all of Joon's family, including his father, dimmed down. 

"Yeah," Joon scoffed loudly, "that's the reaction I was talking about. He was scared of that exact reaction. Thanks for ruining my chances, and thanks for the food. I should leave now. You all wouldn't want to spend a minute more with a faggot like me, would you?" 

"Joon —" 

"Good day, Eomoni. I would be sure to not be in touch. Smother your favourite son all you want. And yes, Abeoji, thanks for making me study so hard. I wouldn't have met Cyan if I wasn't in that company." 

That felt good. Storming out of the room and out of the house, leaving a conversation hanging for the first time in all his life. Joon didn't realise he had left his mobile phone at his parent's house until he was quite far away. 

"Fuck," he said, looking skywards, "I am still not over you." 








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