Harry Potter and the Bucket List

Epilogue - Year 7

Beta: Cloudy

A few scenes throughout year 7. Pure fanfare.

(≖‿‿≖)ノ⌒●~*

I only returned to my childhood home twice during the summer of my sixth year. On my birthday, and on the first day I returned from school to tell Sirius I wouldn't be staying with them over the summer.

With great cheer, I told him, "I'm gonna stay the summer with my boyfriend!"

Sirius mocked me, "How sinful! Do you not feel ashamed for your blatant debauchery?"

I snorted, "I don't wanna hear that from the man who has slept his way through the entire population of Hogsmeade, Godric's Hollow, Devin Meadow—"

"Whore," added Harry idly as he carried in his trunk.

Sirius gasped with great indignation, "It was not the entire population."

"Just most of it?" I teased.

Sirius grinned, unabashed.

Harry sighed, "You're both terrible."

"Nah-uh. I'm a slut for one wizard. Sirius is a slut for anyone hot enough."

"And they get hotter by the shot."

Harry repeated, "Whores."

Sirius and I high-fived.

"Welp, you're practicing safe sex?" Sirius asked me.

"Super safe," I said. "We don't even need a safe word yet."

"Okay," he said. "Then all that's left is meeting him. Bring him over for your birthday—which you are not allowed to skip out."

I saluted. "Yes, sir! Love you bunches."

"Love you too, princess."

(≖‿‿≖)ノ⌒●~*

Tom meeting Sirius and Remus went about as well as one could expect.

Tom was invited over for our birthday dinner, along with Remus, Tonks (who was dating Remus), and Dumbledore (at my insistence).

Since I was staying with Tom that summer, the two of us arrived together, with Harry opening the door and immediately giving Tom the stink eye.

I kicked Harry's shin. "Don't make me actually hurt you."

Harry, while clutching his shin, muttered, "That already hurt."

"Consider that a warning."

"Devil incarnate," Harry grumbled. "You two are perfect for each other."

"Thank you," we said.

"Harry, what did we talk about when calling your sister a devil incarnate?" I heard Remus's voice from further inside.

Harry ushered us inside as he innocently asked, "It's an insult to the devil?"

"HA!"

"Harry!" scolded Remus while Sirius and Tonks chortled.

As Tom and I entered, Sirius came into the front room with his hand raised. He stopped short as soon as he saw Tom, plainly dumbfounded. "Have we met before?"

"I don't think so," said Tom.

"You look so familiar," said Sirius, frowning. "Hey Moony, c'mere."

Remus came in behind, frowning as he adjusted his tie. "What's—huh."

"Right?" asked Sirius. "Doesn't he look familiar?"