Of Alan & Austin | Cashby

•Chapter 22

I sat in my hotel room waiting for any responses from Mr.Black but none were received. I sighed and laid on the bed that once occupied, Austin and I. I had Squidgy laying next to me with its stupid happy smile like Austin had. I groan and shove my face in a pillow.

'I'm such a fuck up!' I think to myself, I sit back up and stare at the ceiling.
I thought about songs and words, basically anything that would shut off that I could possibly die in a few moments.

You leave yourself dead where you stand,
So soft,
Pretty,
and delicate.

I sigh and remember one thing I always kept in my jeans and bag. I reached in my pocket to find my razor, I never used it because the sake of messing up my body for work was far to dangerous to do.

For the first time I was going to use it.

I brought the blade to my wrist carving the words of pain into my arm, going as deep into it as I please.

One Word for Austin.
One Word for my Parents.
One Word for Mr.Black.
One Word for my Best Friends.
One Word for the Bullies.
One Word for Earth.
& Finally One Word for Alan Anthony Ashby.

Sprawled across my bloody arm are the words that everyone have said that remained in my brain. Especially the one I thought of myself, I shut my eyes and let my arm bleed onto the hotel floor as life was being drained out of me, I cuddled the squidgy laying beside me breathing in my final breath which smelled like Austin Carlile, I smiled as I passed out on the bed.

All the people who would ever find me here or know me would see the one word that everyone would remember me by.

It was written in my own blood.

Slut.