Lily's Charm- Severitus fanfiction

Ashes

November 1, 1996--sometime around 4:00am

He hadn't wanted to listen. He had refused to listen. But they had told him, anyway.

Remus' arms held him tightly, and Harry just stood there, staring at the faded brown of Remus' robes, his arms hanging limp at his sides. He didn't care that he was sixteen and being held like a child. He just really didn't care about anything.

Pomfrey's Life Charm was keeping his father alive. But he wasn't really alive at all. It didn't matter that his father's heart was beating, or that his chest was rising and falling in a pale imitation of life. That's all it was. A mirage.

Severus had given up. His father had left him.

--

"No, Albus. I won't believe it," Remus whispered fiercely, glancing quickly down at Harry, whose eyes had glazed over again. "Severus wouldn't just give up like that." Remus glared at the headmaster, who gazed back at him helplessly.

"Severus was dying, Remus," Poppy tried to tell him.

Remus shook his head stubbornly. "I know he would've wanted to stay. For Harry," he emphasized with another look down at the boy standing perfectly still in his arms.

"Remus," Albus breathed sadly, "I'm sure he tried... of course he wouldn't have wanted to leave. You have no idea what Voldemort is capable of, though. It is likely that he was torturing Severus' mind just as soundly as he allowed his Death Eaters to torture his body. I'm certain Voldemort meant to drive his soul away."

Remus stared at him. "His soul?"

Albus nodded solemnly, his blue eyes dull. "Did you really doubt that Voldemort, of all wizards, would discount the importance of allowing one's soul to thrive?"

"Dammit, Albus!" Remus erupted, and both Poppy and the headmaster gaped at him. But he didn't care. What did they think they were doing to Harry? "Why didn't you explain it that way before?" he demanded. As understanding dawned, he said furiously, "This is not the time to worry about keeping Harry from discovering one of your blasted secrets!"

Remus glanced quickly once more at Harry, but Harry seemed to have buried himself again. And for now, Remus was content to let him. Poppy was staring at Albus by this point as well. Remus turned his head to her. "What happened when you went inside Severus' head?" he demanded. Poppy narrowed her eyes.

"Just as Albus told you, it's as if his body is just an empty shell, now," she said slowly. She glanced sideways at Albus. "I hadn't realized—"

Remus cut her off impatiently, turning back to the disgruntled headmaster. "What happened to Severus once Voldemort drove him away?" he demanded brusquely.

Albus frowned, his eyes beginning to lighten. "I can only assume he would have moved on."

"You mean beyond the veil?" Remus pressed quickly, and when Albus nodded, Remus set his jaw. "He would have gone to find Lily." The realization filled Remus with grief.

"Are you certain, Albus?" he asked. "That he's..." Remus couldn't help but lower his voice, "...that there's nothing there?" he pressed.

Poppy answered, cutting the headmaster off, "We couldn't detect any presence there."

Remus tightened his hold around his friend. Harry didn't stir. "But have either of you ever been in Severus' head before... the way Harry has?" The mixture of hope and dread exploded in his chest when both of them shook their heads slowly. "Wouldn't Harry be able to tell for certain?" he asked, trying and failing to keep the excitement from his voice.