At the End of the Garden

Chapter Thirty-Two

I'd only just got Eden smiling again. That was the thing that hurt the most. He'd gotten awful news, but through it all, I'd managed to get him to smile. Would he stop now I was gone? Or am I just being arrogant? My soul was fading out but I'd sell it to be in the garden with him right now. Just once more.
I was still trying to picture it. Change the endless black abyss into the clean cut green grass of that garden with the sunny weather. It was always sunny there. Even when it wasn't.
It felt too soon for voices. The ones I assumed were going to and from school. I had no sense of time but it felt too early to hear anything. I didn't bother to listen and just tried to imagine my brother sitting next to me before I knew he was my brother. But the voices were loud this time. And I heard them in Eden's muffled voice because I wanted to. Trying to remember back to when he was shorter than me and didn't know a thing about brushing his hair. And me, before I knew anything, before things like the ocean scared me.
But the voices didn't go away, neither did they sound like the ones I was trying to imagine.
I tuned in. They were muffled and I couldn't make out who they were or what they were saying. But they were definitely closer than they usually were. If I had felt like it, I would have moved closer to the door. But eventually, their muffling turned into normal talking without much effort on my part.
"I don't think I can take this down."
They must have been right outside.
"Well, try."
"You'd lose less friends if you weren't so bossy - and what about after. A busted door is a little weird."
"And what? Mr Quinn is not going to go to the police and report that the child he locked in there is missing! Jesus, just try,"
"You're very set on her being in here."
"I'm not. Just kick down the stupid door."
I know who they are. I know who they are! Voices I never thought I'd hear again. I tried to move but froze at the sound of a large band. Someone kicked the door again. Then again.
"Oi, you have to help as well. It's fucking heavy."
There was a slight noise of protest before the sound of slamming got heavier. And then. The lock broke.
I think it was night outside, but even just the little bit a light coming through the tiny gap in the door meant I couldn't really tell. I even tried to duck out of it. With more noise and struggling, they managed to make the light bigger.
"Holy shit. You was right." He said. I couldn't look up at him yet.
"Is she alive?" She said. The other one.
For the first time in a while, I looked up at the light. I hadn't dreamed them.
Sidney and Angie. Stood in front of me. But I couldn't have been that sure because this new occurrence drained my energy and I fell back again. For the last time in this stupid, dripping box.

Sidney was alive? After all this time. Good. I'm really glad.

It was somewhat uncomfortable. Being comfortable. It had been a while since I'd felt it. I wasn't comfortable in the box but when it hit me I was somewhere new... I thought I was going to die there, but now I wasn't there anymore. What now? I panicked. Is there something else?
"She has to go to a hospital."
That was Ren's voice, I think. I was happy to hear her voice.
"No. I've told you we can't."
Angie. I was happy to hear her too. Ecstatic, stupidly, that she was near me of her own freewill.
"Ang, please just explain. We can't listen to you if you don't tell us why."
Michael's voice. It was always nice to hear him speak, since he's always so quiet.
"Yeah, you have fifteen seconds before I call 999." Ren again.
"I can't!" Angie said.
I think I got why. Not really, not the details. But I think I understood her a little more.
I think I get it. Angie. It was...
My eyes opened slightly. Not an attractive flutter open, more like a squint. I could finally pay attention the room I was in. A big room. The walls were a warm pale orange, which made me think I could have actually been in a hospital. I was laying on my side, and could make out three, no four, people. One on the edge of the bed. One standing. One at the desk opposite and one on the floor. I shut my eyes again.
"Did she just say something?" Ren said.
Someone came over and put a hand on my head. It must have been Ren because her voice was louder when she muttered, "freezing." Then, "are you awake?"
I tried to open my eyes again. Ren was leaning over me. It was even better to see her. But I must have looked awful, eyes lost as a cows probably.
In true Renée style, she dropped her previous anger instantly and gave me huge grin.
"You idiot. Where have you been?"
"In a box?" I tried to smile back.
"Well it definitely weren't a five-star hotel." She frowned, and tried to help me sit up (it didn't work, I had to lay back instantly). "You've been locked there the whole time."
"Uh-huh."
"On your own? No food, no nothing?"
I nodded and repeated the word 'nothing.' As if it was only because I was reminded, my throat felt sore. I hated that I could hear my voice. So swollen and dry.
"How long has it been?" I asked.
"A week, we think." Ren answered. "We came to yours Saturday and you weren't there."
"Aww."
Ren turned to others. "We should get her something to eat."
"Wait." Michael interrupted. "If you feed her too much suddenly, she might get worse."
"What?"
"Don't you remember? In history, they said something about holocaust survivors dying even when they were rescued, because the soldiers fed them too soon."
"Okay. This is why she needed to be in hospital." Ren said, smile gone. She was frowning in specifically in Angie's direction.
"No - we can look it up. Find out what we can give her..."
"Seriously?" Ren spat at her.
"We should get her some water for now." Michael said, before getting up from his spot at the end of the bed and rushed out the room. The door opened and closed quietly, but it still made my head hurt.
"And you? What do you think?" Ren spat, again.
She turned to face the person on the floor, and I found the energy to turn onto my side again to look too.
He didn't say a word. Didn't even look at us. He had his arm propped up on one leg and was biting the tops of his fingers.
"You're not seriously going to agree with her, are you?" Ren questioned.
I didn't know what he knew, if Angie had told him anything (I doubted it). But he was stupidly bright, in a way everyone else seemed to ignore because he wasn't quite the same, talked different and didn't have the attention span to focus in class. Had he worked out where the danger was? Did he realise that me going to hospital ran the risk of seeing Victor Quinn again?
"I don't know." He eventually said.
Ren made a displeased noise and crossed her arms. I tilted my head to look at Angie, she didn't look back. Had she always known who Luka was killed by?
So, I looked back at Sidney, who was also refusing to look at me. All that digging to find out what happened to his foster-sister. Did he think it would come to this?
"You could have been dead, I wouldn't have known."
I hadn't realised I'd said it out loud. Too dizzy to really care what was in my head and what wasn't. He finally returned my gaze. Just for a moment, guilt flashed in his expression. Wide eyes and bitten nails still between his teeth. Then it was gone, replaced with frustration. He got up, went to the door and almost knocked over Michael on his way back in as he left.
At first, I thought Michael had given me alcohol instead of water. It burned. But it helped me realise I was still somewhat fucked, even though I was out of the box.
But I managed to supress that feeling to fall asleep again.

I wasn't sure how long I'd been out, though I could barely consider it sleep. I'd been slipping in and out of consciousness uncomfortably most of the time. I could hear them talking outside the room, or someone would cough and it would draw me into the real world. Only when they started arguing did I wake up properly.
"My parents will be home eventually." Michael said, more tense than I was used to.
"So then we need to get her to a hospital." Ren completed Michael's argument.
"Renée you can't." Angie begged.
I heard a loud inhale of breath, that definitely belonged to Ren who was about to start arguing.
"I've... errr...." That sounded like Sidney.
"You what?" Ren said in challenging tone.
"Have a friend... I've been staying at hers, we could take her there." Sidney continued.
"That's not a hospital." Ren growled, she was making less and less of an effort to be quiet, lucky I was already awake. "What if we took her to a hospital like, under a fake name?"
"No! Ren!" Angie's whine was a mix of terrified and a spoilt brat not getting her own way. "They're looking for her. And we'll look suspicious if we show up. They've already got Sidney down as a suspect."
"Really?" There was a hint of surprise in his voice.
So that I could hear better, I tried to sit up, but when my head began spinning I dropped back onto the the bed with a thud and slight groan. Like that, Michael was alerted and poked his head in through the slightly open door.
"Oh. I'm so sorry, did we wake you?" He rushed in, sat on the side of the bed and brushed a hand over my head like Ren had done earlier. "You're still so cold."
He helped me sit up properly and handed me the glass of water that had been empty when I'd fallen asleep, now full.
I was barely surprised that it was Michael who was the most fussy. He visibly cared a lot and had a good bedside manner. If he stopped looking so nervous, he could be a nurse or something. I drunk the water he handed me, it still burned but I felt better. Ren eventually followed Michael in, and her face formed an expression which I associated with a light bulb appearing over her head.
"Let's ask Marie what she wants to do." Ren said, and ushered Angie and Sidney into the room.
Angie looked more nervous than I'd ever seen her in my entire life, Sidney just shrugged (if I'd learned anything from Eden it was that he could have been just as nervous as Angie).
"Well." Ren urged, "you think we should go to a hospital, right?"
"Don't feel forced to answer." Michael said, after giving Ren a look for being too sharp.
The first time I tired to speak it came out in an ugly croak. I coughed, and eventually got the word "I" out of my throat.
Though, it wasn't like I knew what to say. I felt sick. I'd never been sick enough to need to go to a hospital before. But I recognised when I should go. Still. I understood Angie. I did. And I was going to admit it. The thought of facing Victor Quinn scared me. He could get away with this, with my mum as his lawyer, with all that money behind him and he would be able to waltz right into my hospital room if he wanted. He could leave me flowers.
"No hospital." I shook my head.
Angie's sigh of relief was obnoxious.
"Wait, are you serious?" Ren's voice went so high pitched I hardly recognised it as hers. "Are you sure?" She then turned to Angie. "There really is something you need to tell us. Isn't there?"
"Ren." Michael said, to draw her attention back to me.
Without realising, I'd squeezed my eyes shut and put a hand on my temple in attempt to control the headache growing.
I was ready to die not too long ago. I could live without a hospital.
"Fine." She said, quieter. "This friend of yours, where abouts is she?"
"Tube and a train away. If we go to London Bridge we can get the train from there."
"That's far."
Sidney shrugged. "Where else could we go?"
The comment ended the conversation.