Peace Minus You

34

I feel so down. Nang dahil sa suntukan ay cancel ang concerts. I am not the only one that is affected by what happened. The team rehearsed already for the shows, and the fans anticipated for it to happen.

Some fans turned their backs against me. It's all over social media. They all have the right to do that. I will respect whatever decisions they have made, at least I could say that once upon a time, they supported me, and they appreciated the body of work I was able to put out there.

Masakit. I just need to understand my situation because nobody will.

Habang nakahilig sa sofa ay marahan akong tumutugtog sa gitara. Sa dami ng iniisip ay hindi na namalayan kung ano ang tinutugtog ko.

"Have you made the right decision after all?" Tim interrupted my train of thought. Tumigil ako sa pag-strum ng gitara.

"Yes," mariin kong sagot bago muli nagpatuloy sa pagtugtog.

"But the results of your punches..." himutok ni Tim.

"Yeah, damay lahat. Pero tao lang ako. Sinuntok ako kaya susuntok din ako pabalik. Hindi ako makapapayag na gawin niya akong punching bag." Reklamo ko sa kaniya.

Hindi na siya nagkomento pa matapos kong sabihin iyon. I dropped the guitar at the center table ang picked up my phone. Binalikan ko ang video ni Pochi na kasama si Exodus, ang napagkamalan kong boyfriend niya, na cheater. This time ay normal speed ang video.

Seeing the two of them together in one frame made me turn off my phone. Not by jealousy. But by the problems it brought me. I think it's time for me to let go. My fondness over her videos... and just accept that we won't be together.