Hurricane- JJ Maybank (Outer Banks)

21.

We sat at a bonfire, trying to warm ourselves up as the moon peaked out front behind the clouds. I laid in JJ's arms, leaning against a tree branch. He had a large stick in his hands and kept poking at the fire. I leaned back into his lap, watching his eyes light up from the flames. Everyone was arguing about Sarah. I knew it wasn't going to be good, but I supported John B fully. I had hoped he wasn't using Sarah just for the gold, but if he had to lie a little for Kie's sake that was fine with me. I just chose to lay back and ignore what was happening. I watched JJ start talking but I was so out of it, I couldn't make out what he was saying. I was in my own world, admiring the one and only JJ Maybank do what he loves most, talk.

"Rach, are you there? Hello?" Kie was snapping at me as I lifted my head up, hitting JJ's forehead in doing so.

"Ouch." He grabbed his forehead and gave me a laugh.

"Sorry, J. What were we talking about?"

"Sarah Cameron? Have you been paying any attention?" She was pissed and I assumed she wanted my opinion on it.

"Not really, sorry."

"How about we change the subject? You and JJ? What happened to the rules?" She walked over to be closer to the fire. "And you keep denying it, just give it up."

"We aren't together." JJ exclaimed, and I leaned out of his hold.

"Is that really true? How about the comments and the constant flirting? You can't be out of each other's reach for longer than a few minutes without your knees buckling." She tossed a stick into the fire.

"Why is this any of your problem? It has nothing to do with you." I moved away from JJ, lifting my knees to my face. "Even if it did, can't you just trust me for once? I'm not lying to you. You're one of my best friends. Why would I lie?" I tried to bury my face.

"Because I know you have before. So you're lying again. God, can't you just tell the truth for once?"

"You know what? Since I'm such a big fucking liar, I'm just gonna go. Thanks for everything, let me know if you end up finding the gold. I believe in you John B, don't listen to what anyone else has to say. If you think it's out there, if you think your dads out there, I do too. I've always believed in you, and I will continue to. You can do this. I hope you aren't using Sarah just for that fact, but I know you're making the right choice. You always do."

"What? Why are you leaving?" John B stands up, walking over to me as I began to walk away.

"Because, I'm obviously not wanted here."

"That's not true. I want you here." His hand goes around my wrist. I look up to him and see the sorry in his eyes. He truly was the only one who truly cared for me. I looked back to JJ, he had no emotion on his face. Kie was still pissed. Pope hasn't spoken a word.

"I'm glad someone cares. But I have to go. Seriously. I believe in you, I'm so proud of you JB." I grabbed his hand and dropped it down to his side.

I saw tears beginning to well in his eyes as I walked away into the woods. We weren't far from John B's so I just kept walking. The wind was blowing hard. There was definitely a storm brewing. I arrived to John B's, the cops were gone. I opened the back screen door and walk into my bedroom. I take my dress off and slip into a big t shirt. I hadn't even checked to see if it was clean or who's it was. More than likely it was JJ's, the man never cleaned up after himself. I saw a pile of his many hats on his nightstand. God, I just felt like an idiot. I should've known that this all was way too good to be true. Maybe my mom was right.

-

I heard the screen door open abruptly and my door swung open. JJ stood in the doorway, he looked upset.

"Rachel."

"JJ, I can't do this."

"Do what?"

"The whole fake relationship shit. I thought you liked me, I was so hesitant for so long because I knew this would happen. You just wanted to use me when you were upset, well I'm not going to take it. I really thought you liked me for who I was and not just to kiss and touch for fun. That's so toxic, JJ. You're so toxic. I watched you almost kill your dad! Would you have done it if I wasn't there? You'd just be proving everyone right. Everyone told me to stay away from you and I refused because I thought you were different. I couldn't stay away from you, I needed you. You came into my life right when I needed you to, I really really needed someone. You were my someone, but I wasn't yours. You just teased me and made me believe someone was capable of loving me. Damn, was I so stupid. I feel so fucking dumb. No one is capable of loving me, my own dad left. My mom beats me. I'm a druggie dropout. I'm so sick of myself and I'm not going to let you drag me down with you. I took the fall because I care about you and I knew that something would happen. I knew, because you're my best friend. I trusted you. And you let me down."

"You know what, Rachel? You're right. I never cared, I never liked you. I lied to get in your pants. And it worked! It really worked! I was getting so close, I could almost taste it! I've been playing you for over a year just so I could taste you. I barely even got to, because you're a fucking prude. I'm SO toxic! The most toxic person I know! You don't even have to remind me! My dad reminds me everyday, he almost killed me today. So yeah, maybe I would've killed him. But it had nothing to do with you- I would kill for you. But you can't see that. You're too blind and stupid to see how much I'd do for you. I'm so glad to hear that everyone told you to stay away, but I know I'm just too much to stay away from. I'm probably the worst thing that's ever happened to you, huh? From strangers to friends, friends into lovers, and strangers again huh? Is that what you want? Good! I'm gone! Let me grab my shit and I'll be out of your life forever! I'll leave the whole ass island for you. Just so you don't have to go through all that pain I'm causing. I can't believe I let a kook princess like you think I was in love with you. I never fucking loved you and I never will." He spit at me in the doorway. It felt like he yelled at me for eternity. I didn't even realize that I was crying a river on to my bedsheets.

"JJ-"

"Nope! This is over, well it was never a thing. I'm gone. Have a great fucking life, Rachel McDaniels. I hope I never have to see you ever again." He grabbed a bag and threw some of his belongings scattered on the floor into it.

I looked down to see I was wearing his shirt. I begin to pull my arms out of it and he stops me.

"Don't even bother. I don't need another reminder of you."

I pulled my arms back in, beginning to hyperventilate. I watched as he grabbed the last of his things and he turned his back to me.

"JJ, please."

"Goodbye, Rachel."

He didn't bother turning around to let me see his face one last time before shutting the door. I let out a loud sob, almost screaming. I should've listened to everyone, it was all my fault.