Dork Diaries 9: Tales From a Not-So Dorky Drama Queen [#Wattys2015]

Saturday, April 5th

        I literally want to tear the dork's f**king hair out of her scalp! That girl made a really stupid mistake of messing with me and my lovelife. Gahh! I swear I might break something. Maybe her back....

        So today in the morning, I had to board Grandpa's private jet to go to the Hamptons because I'm fabulous like that. Half an hour later, I arrive at Auntie Clarissa's place. The beach house looks super modern with glass windows and three stories high. There's a hot tub on the inside and a surplus of Auntie's latest cosmetic products.

"Kenz, darling," she comes out with the hottest fashions and clip clopping high heels.

"Auntie," I run towards her and embraces her in a hug.

"Come in, darling. We need to change you into some Dolce & Gabbana beach attire. I heard the Sumner boys are hitting the beach this weekend," she leads me into the fresh lemon-scenting air of the house.

"Really!? OMG! I would love to take a selfie with them," I whip out my new iPhone 6 plus. Daddy got me it this morning before I left. Plus the Sumner boys are these totally hot 17 year-old models from Cali and I used to have surfing lessons with them. 

        As Auntie gets me a hot bikini suit, I change into it quickly and put on my Jimmy Choo flip flops that cost a fortune. Then she puts on her newest line of makeup called 'Fabulous Spring Fling'. I put my hair up into a high ponytail and leave like a boss.

        After arriving, I quickly run over to one of the hot Sumner Boys, Ethan. I nearly melt by his hard abs and bleach blonde hair.

"Ethan, hon, do you mind taking a selfie with me? My followers on both Facebook and Instagram are DYING to see me in my cute new bikini at the beach," I smile, showing my straight, white, teeth.

"Sure, shorty," I take out my phone and take the picture. After posting it on Instagram and Facebook, I go onto Brandon's facebook profile. What? I'm just curious.

Then, I notice his new post and it says, IN A RELATIONSHIP!

        OMG! I can't believe he's my BOYFRIEND without even asking me out first! He knows exactly what I'm thinking. Who wouldn't want a man like that?

I dial his number and at the second tone, it disconnects.

        Hmm, maybe he's like at church and can't pick up the phone. That's the only logical reason he would ignore my call, right?

        So that entire day, I waited and waited until he returns my call or sends me a text. Maybe even a poke on Facebook. But NO! Not one single thing did he do. What the actual fluck?

        Then my mind started wandering where it shouldn't? What if he isn't in a relationship with me? What if he's........dating......someone ELSE? 

        That's when I can see smoke coming out of my ears. 

If.

He.

Is. 

Together.

With.

That. 

...

DORK!

I scream out loud a piercing shriek. People turn to me, confused and disgruntled. I get my stuff and stomp back to the house.

I quickly go on Kik and add everyone's kik on my group conversation at school.

And I did what I should've done months ago.

Nikki Maxwell is attending WCD on a bug extermination scholarship. Her dad is our school's exterminator. How pathetic is that? BUG GIRL!!

Soon, everyone started sending LOLs and BUG GIRL puns. Dang, does it feel this good to be bad?

Just wait until tomorrow, Nikki. Oops, I mean BUG GIRL!