My Prey - Hawks x OC

Ruffled Feathers [7]

Even before Reti and I crossed into the apartment, I could hear frantic pacing. I sighed as Reti whined, her head tilted in confusion. I rose my hand to the door, and realised I was shaking.

I was shaking.

Taking a step back, I swallowed a painful breath. Still, my hand shook. Was confronting Hawks really so petrifying? Or was it just the confrontation in general? Strange how when I would be around my parents, my siblings, the customers, I was always portraying such a display of confidence, acting like I was in some sort of comedy. A tragic comedy, one laced and spiked with misfortune lurking around every corner. Even when I was going to meet with Nao, having the intention to explain everything, I never felt nervous. Not even once.

But somehow, with Hawks just on the other side of that door, this conversation meant so much more. My actions, my words, my expressions, my everything would matter. There was no time for facades, I had to be real. But real was scary. And unfortunately, necessary.

Before I could backpedal, I gripped the handle and twisted it, keeping my head down as I entered. I knelt down and unleashed Reti, who happily trotted towards Hawks. I could tell that he stood still, I could feel a predatory gaze watch my every move. I was completely paralyzed, every fiber in my body humming with nervous energy. It was now or never.

"Hawks, I-"

My emerald eyes widened as I was swept up in a bone-crunching hug, his head buried deep in the nape of my neck. His wings were hung around me like a protective barrier, blocking out the light. "Bubbles," he whispered hoarsely, as though he had been crying. Maybe he had been. It was hard to see that being a reality, but at this point, nothing would shock me.

Except for Hawks.

"I'm sorry I've confused you so much, I don't realise what kind of effect I have on people until way after the fact," he admitted, his arms tightening around me. "I've gone and hurt you without even noticing, not even caring about what you felt. I just looked at you and decided you were mine, and I still think that, but fuck-" he choked, finally tearing himself off of my small frame. His hands slid from my shoulders up to cup my cheeks, his amber eyes desperate. "I don't want to upset you anymore, and I'm not going to bother hiding it, although people might frame me as a fool for this." He shuddered, and my eyes trembled, stinging at the corners. And here I thought I was the one suffering.

"I don't care what other people think. Bubbles, I'm not teasing you," he promised, his eyes hardening with resolve. "Damn it, I like you, and that makes me sound like I am in fucking middle school but I don't care. For me, I was hooked the moment I saw you, and not a single thing you've done has made me doubt that. If anything, your flaws, your actions, your own personal quirks have drawn me closer." He gently brushed aside a strand of hair that fell loose, his eyes softening. "I'm told I go too fast. And I have been too fast, to my own detriment, multiple times," his voice grew hushed, his eyes briefly losing themselves in some distant memory. "And even now, with you, I have moved too fast. Bubbles, when you left, it was then that I realised how I had messed it up. I... I won't deny to wanting you, I do, but...

"I just want you to be ready. Because I am, I know that, but are you?"

I really looked at him then. Really looked, not just the exterior, but I made sure to analyze him as a person too. He was fierce and brave, I'd witnessed that before when he rescued me from the car. He was dedicated and loyal, reaching out to me first and having never left my side. He was an honest friend, really questioning as to whether the people around me were actually good people. He was the first person to do any of these things, the first person to show me how... Not awful every corner of life was. In one month alone, he had me completely whipped. And so, I opened my mouth, ready to respond.

And then Nao's face flashed through my mind. The sting fresh on my cheek.

My heart fell. Nao...

My face fell. Tears threatening to spill at the corners of my eyes.

"I'm not," I croaked, and he stiffened slightly. He removed his hands from my cheeks and gently brought me in, holding me against his chest softly. "I'm not... ready yet," I admitted, and he hushed me gently, pressing my head against his chest. His hand ran up and down my back soothingly, and as he did so my arms managed to wrap around his. I clutched his shirt, burying my face in his chest.

He ran his hand through my hair, and cleared his throat. "Thank you for being honest," he said chipperly, and I felt my face wipe clean. He wasn't... Upset? "But you have to promise me one thing," he grinned, a devious look entering his eyes. I nodded, albeit slightly hesitantly. "You absolutely must sleep in the bed. You can't just cuddle with the dog, that's not cool," he stated, and I rolled my eyes.

"Fine, but the dog can cuddle on the bed anyways."

"Absolutely fucking deal!" He cheered, and hoisted me up and above his shoulder.

"W-Woah, I need to change first!" I explained, and he promptly dropped me on the ground.

"Right right, how could I forget. At least this way, I can feel all of your soft bits," he winked, turning around and throwing off his shirt.

Sweet cherry parfaits what this boy did to my fragile heart. Conveniently, I forgot all about his scandalous words, gathering my clothes together and rushing to the bathroom to change.

When I came out, he was already settled, his feathers scattered across the bed in a chaotic fashion. He held an Endeavor manga above his head, his eyes scanning the pages, eating up every scene with voracity. I smiled softly, crawling into bed beside him. I patted the covers after I had settled, and Reti hopped up beside me, curling up around herself on my left side. I faced her and laid my head on her feather-soft belly, sighing comfortably. Broad hands gripped my waist and spun me around to the other side, before large arms locked me in. A violent flush bloomed on my face before I managed to say something.

"Why couldn't I be next to Reti?"

"Because she doesn't deserve your cuddles," Hawks huffed, squeezing me tighter.

"Are... Are you jealous?" I asked incredulously, turning my head up to face him.

He pressed my head back down to the mattress. "So what if I am, it doesn't matter. Just stop talking and go to sleep," he sighed, shifting slightly. I shivered slightly, trying hard to focus on my drooping eyes rather than the man behind me. But it was hard. Excruciatingly hard. Especially with his warm breath against the back of my neck. Still, though, it was hard to deny the comforting presence of Hawks behind me. Something about him just made me feel...

Safe. Loved. I gently placed my hand on his, tracing my thumb along the back of it. I didn't want to lose this feeling.