My feelings My emotions

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The rain pours down ending the raging fire. Each drop of tear from the clouds cause each rage and anger from the fire to cool down. The tapping water on the earth as plants grow around me. My mother's body used to be fertiliser for the grass around it. The place you once called home, a place you grew up in. Now it's in ruins like the places your mother and father use to bring you when you were a child.

The ruins of buildings from wars and neglected villagers. All became an empty wasteland where no laughter or Joy will be heard ever again. From all the pain and suffering that has happened.

Every ruin has its story and every story has its meaning. And every action has its meaning so what are you doing?

You were still stunned by the fact the place you call home is now just ashes, your mother you loved so much is not even recognisable. Your tears start to flow down your cheeks you weren't sad... No not at all but as a kid, your body will make you cry anytime you feel anger.

You hated it.

It made you look weak, you feel weak.

But you weren't weak at all.

You cry sitting on the ground that was once the lawn of your house. Gripping the dead grass around you. You can hear the sirens coming. You just wanted your father to be there for you. But you knew he wouldn't care. If anything he would be glad your mother died.

You were scared. You have to stay with your father again. My father left me for another woman, even I respect that woman more than my father. She tried convincing him that I was too young for my parents to divorce.

At least I know I have someone to trust at that dreadful place they call home. I rather live in the streets than feel unwanted.

Well, not exactly unwanted... Your father has two sons and no daughter he wants you to marry a rich man. But your mother wouldn't allow that to happen. She loves you and she wants you to be happy.

Your tears start to flow down your cheeks harder streaming like a waterfall.

'In some other life, we are laughing off the thought of us in another life being apart' my mother quoted and I didn't know the deep meaning behind this until I lost her.

She was my everything, she loved me, she cared about me, she would die for me, she would lie for me, but then she left me.

I don't want to be with my 'father' I wanted to be free. I wanted to just live. But my father would never allow me to do so.

I wish I could have gotten here faster.

So I can join my mother.

Before I knew it the firefighters went up to me, they were trying to calm me down while I explain the situation. I can still hear the drop of rain, the fires rage, the tears from people around me.

I feel numb inside, my brain seems to be flooded by thoughts. I finish talking to the firefighter. Before I could leave for the truck.

My eyes feel heavy, I feel like I can't walk. My eyes fuzzy, and I can't move my body.

"OH GOSH SHE FAINTED"

"IS SHE OK?"

"OH MY DEARY"

"SOMEONE HELP HER!"

"HELP HER UP! PLEASE I BEG OF YOU"

I couldn't hear anything anymore.





















I wake up.

I'm in a hospital bed.

I grew up with a weak immune system, I was oh so familiar with the hospital near my house. I know the nurse who is always a sign to me since I need 'special' treatment for my ADHD. I'm not surprised it was because of my father leaving me.

I have gotten into a spiralling depression. Ever since then I was vulnerable, the weak girl in town. Before I continue my other thoughts the nurse I ever so needed came in.

"Hello, Meta? Are you feeling better? I'm sorry for what happened. I brought you some pasta for you" Mrs Honey said

"Thanks, Mrs Honey..." I said to her

"Of course dear. If you need anything just call me like always, I'll let you be now my dear" she says as she left me in the room.

Mrs Honey is my mother's childhood friend, Honey reminds me of a character from the movie Matilda. The sweet brunette teacher, with the most perfect smile.

Mrs Honey also had brown hair, but her hair was wavy and she was a bit chubby. But even that so it's not her appearance that shines, it's her caring personality that everyone loves so much.

My thoughts were flooded once more with my 'father' entering my room. I forgot I was still holding my pasta so put the pasta away ready for the dreadful invite from my 'father' to live with him.

He smiled at me, oh boy... He either already found a husband for me or found a potential husband "Hello deary.. It's nice to see you again! I'm happy to say you will be living with me again I can't wait for you to meet your brothers. And of course, you are 24 now how can I forget? I'm sorry but you'll be spending your birthday with a potential husband of yours! He's kind and such a gentleman and not to forget how rich he is"

He said that with a happy tone and a smile on his face. Normal people will call him crazy for smiling after his ex-wife just died.

But knowing him personally it wouldn't be weird it would be normal. It angers me that he always ignores my mother and now is the worst time to ignore her.

I wanted to scream at him to let my anger flow. But I know I would just cry again and make myself look pathetic. I just silently nodded at him.

He was happy with my answer as he head to the door he stops "don't worry some of your clothes are in the new house you were going to move into. So you don't need to worry about your wardrobe even if you didn't have clothes I would buy you. I will give the nurse your clothes so you can get ready to go back home!"

He leaves the room before I could say anything... Fuck... I can't believe I'm gonna marry I random dude. I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M GONNA SPEND MY BIRTHDAY WITH A RANDOM DUDE! Gosh... Why did this happen to me... Mom I wish you were still here... I fucking hate dad.

I just wanna go outside and run into the rain crying, screaming, and let all my emotions go.

I miss you, mom.

_________________________________________

Hello everybody I'm Meta (No my character is not all me I'm just not creative at names :)

I'm sorry for the short chapter!

And just the depression rush as well..

Chapter 2 is where you meet Kakyoin soo don't worry cherry boy will be here soon.

Ayyyyy 1194 words :D

~Meta-Chan 🐸

𝘽𝙚𝙩𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙣 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙍𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙋𝙚𝙩𝙖𝙡𝙨Where stories live. Discover now