Breaking Cycles and Rising Through the Cracks

No Such Thing As Luck

Luck isn't a gift from the God's everyone's got it. Some people are just more in tune with the same gifts the creator gave everyone. Truth is always hidden within lies we're all old souls and empathic it's just a matter of training and focus. Luck and fate are the same thing and it's not a coincidence. There's no such thing as luck just the world we create and what we have manifested.
So what world do you choose to lead a world of love or a world of hate.
Because the world I see has a lot of hate in it the leaders acting like mosses parting the sea, but water has always had a calm effect on me.
It just comes and goes at its own content.
Giving live to both sea, and land, but this is not all that our water does. It too has a shadow that it hides.
Everything hides a demon if you open your eyes. 
So are you swimming up or drifting further down?
You're gasping for air
While your body snaps, and squirms,  your  lungs burning for air.

Gotta find solid ground.  Hard to grow when your roots can't sprout.
It's pretty interesting to me, how we all go about growing our metaphorical tree differently.
We can all get so caught up in the dogma of what others believe
Get so caught up in our heads over thinking.
That we can't escape things.
To blind to others problems and different upbringings.
So I'm asking you to think again.
To question things.
Are you on the side of freedom or are you still following?

I know that my ideas and morals are different. I believe that's there's truth in the bible, truth in new age, truth in the lie that the devil sells us In our daily routine. Even a broken clock is correct twice a day.
So maybe there's truth in every text around the world.
But the price is what it always was how disciplined are you to learning? Who resistant to change are you? That's been a few of the lesser prices of any teaching since the dawn of mankind.
Religion has helped us to understand one another in some sort of way. Most try to teach you about love, ethics, hard work, ways to cope... Humans have always had knacks for stories, but we also have a knack for dividing, to group things together. To enforce order.
The other prices we pay for education, for knowledge are as follows
Wars, death, and authority, when knowledge is hijacked for an agenda it is absolutely corrupted
Creating dogma, infighting and oppression.
But these things too have merit...
And so the circle continues.
It truly is up to the individual to decide their own fate.
What price do you choose to pay?
I have stated many times how I used to be loyal to the things that destroyed my life.
But here's the thing about that.
We've all got a choice to make.
I chose myself for once and now people are more than happy to come up and spy on me.
I just always act like I don't hear it
Because if I'm being honest I'm quite flattered people feel the need to comment about me even when I'm not bothering anybody.
Just sticking to a routine, finding consistency.
Funny to see how low people really think of me.
Once you're given a certain image or when people spread gossip it's hard to shake that likeness.
No matter much you prove yourself you just can't change the stigma people have given you.
Goes to show you
That you must truly be careful of the circle you keep. The bigger the group the easier it is for snakes and wolves in sheep's clothing to get the information they need on you.

Can you say that you're making an attempt to be happy?
When you can feel people's energy it's draining
Especially when you're around negative people.
For once in my fucking life I have found some solitude and peace just doing me.
You don't need to rain on the parade.
I get to choose when I work,
I get to choose what I do with my time
I have the fucking freedom to do what I want.
I don't write for attention I don't share the fame
I'm trying to teach people things
So that they don't have to learn the hard way like me. If nots something you can understand then I don't know what else to say.
I'm not giving my time away for free anymore, because I've finally realized my own value.
Hurt people, hurt, people as the old saying goes.

So why is that people who didn't really care about in the first place always want to come back around and see what you're up too?
You didn't really care before, now that you see something new you wanna take a little more?
I may be stubborn, but even I have learned how damaging that truly is, sometimes the best thing we can do is stay away. Let others sort out their own misery.
That doesn't mean I've stopped loving however...
Because when you hold hate, when you hold rage, nothing grows from a stable place.
Revenge is a fools game.
Learned that one the hard way too.
Guess that's how it goes. Made me a better person for it though.
So that's just the way it goes.
No one can take you down a peg better then yourself.
So please be careful what you speak.
Karma doesn't care about keeping friends karma only cares about equality.
So continue to take out your anger on me.
If it makes it easier to process things.
Everyone's see through to me.
Call it gut feelings.
I know my flaws
Stubborn, indecisive, Weird, self-deprecating, creep. Some negative words I know I'd use to sum me up others I've heard others use.
But I'm really trying here to just be better than I was.
I know I'm the reason I'm the way I am.
I try to please people
Take things personal
Do too much, say the wrong things, I do a lot wrong;
But I do my best to not stay in the dumps
My mood just swings but I'm always trying to be on the up and up.
The saying fake it till you make it is true. I have no idea what I'm doing when I write.
I just write to let go of feelings and thoughts.
Years of unworked through problems can be a big project.
But even with the small progress I've made I can say the pay off has been worth the initial admission.

Although I may not have apologized to everyone I've hurts face. Be it resentment, or my own cowardice.
I do feel bad for every mistake I've made. And I am sorry.My pride and ego not my best traits.
Atonement is the end goal,
For me that means being better than the person I was in the past.
That means knowing I don't carry the weight of the worlds on my back.
Everyone is just as human as me.
We should all be taught what love truly is.
To question what is taught to us in school.
To follow our hearts, towards our dreams.
To stop beating ourselves up
That accepting our wrongs is part of growing up.
That making excuses will only hurt you in long run.
Being accountable decpite how low it may make you feel.
That sometimes the people we call friends are really enemies.
No matter how you are, someone has always got something negative to say.
The things I've learned over the last 3 years
Keep calling me a Narc and creep.
Karma always comes around baby.