The Age Of Love

Nine - Kensington

The wheels of his carry-on bumped along the jetway as he made his way off the plane. Once he reached the gate, he set his things on a seat and stretched his muscles. He rolled his neck and shook the circulation back into his legs. He wasn't as young as he used to be, and his 35-year-old body was stiff after twelve hours stuck in one spot. Plus, he hadn't been able to fly first-class because of the short notice.

He needed to talk to his parents before they found out about their granddaughter from someone else. He also wanted it over with so he could get back home to Eun Jung.

Home. It was strange how easily he thought of Seoul as home even though he hadn't lived there in over ten years. London had been his home for seven years and in less than 48 hours, it was nothing more than a pit stop.

Deep down he knew a part of his heart had always remained on Seoul. And now he was returning home-- to her. It was the dream he'd kept buried for the better part of a decade-- the wish he'd never let himself say out loud. But this was not how the dream was supposed to go.

What would life look like now? Nothing like the one he'd been building in England. And nothing like the one he'd been dreaming of in Seoul. It would be a life with Se Ri and without her at the same time. Some halfway relationship. Not that their two-year affair was something whole and fulfilling, but he always knew that was temporary. At some point, Se Ri would leave him-- or ask him to leave Hye Jin. He'd always known it would be the former, always hoped it would be the later.

Now, this was different. Eun Jung tied them together forever. He'd never be able to get rid of her. Would he ever get over her and be able to move on now that they shared a daughter? Would he let himself fall again and wind up getting his heart crushed by her like it had been so many times before?

No. He couldn't worry about that right now. He had to concentrate on Eun Jung. On being able to offer her the best life possible. His daughter was the woman in his life now. She's who he needed to think about. She was the priority. Every moment he was away from her was painful.

He didn't know he'd fallen so deep into fatherhood so quickly. He'd always known he'd have a child someday-- he was practically duty-bound to produce an heir. And yet, he'd never thought much about it-- never dreamed about rocking a baby to sleep, or going vacation with the family. Maybe he'd considered it a bit when he'd proposed to Se Ri. But it was a distant thought and once she was gone, so was any paternal inclination.

But whether he wanted it or not was irrelevant now. He was a father, and not just in name. The second he'd learned about Eun Jung's existence, something shifted in him. He'd changed... in an instant. Before he met her-- before he knew her-- he loved her. God, he missed her already. Her beautiful eyes, her tiny and pink toes, the way her fingers curled around his pinkie.

He resisted the urge to text Se Ri again. It was early there. He didn't want to wake her or the baby. He'd suffer through customs first, then he'd check-in. He could wait a couple more hours. If there was a problem, Se Ri would let him know. He had to believe that.

The problem was he didn't. He didn't believe it. He felt the panic bubbling up again like it had last night. She was so far away. He was thousands of miles away from his daughter. He knew, in his head, that Se Ri wasn't going to run away with his child, but even so, how much would she let him in?

If the hospital called with the blood results and there was something wrong, would she call him? If Eun Jung was colicky, would she tell him? He wished he could say, unequivocally, yes. He wished the feeling in his gut was just paranoia. But he didn't think it was. For as much as Se Ri relied on others. when push came to shove, she did things the way she always did. Alone.