Your voice feels beautiful ~TodoBaku~

Chapter 1: silence has that strange thing where it's both comforting and not

I'll be using ASL for this fic. Despite being British, I know more ASL than BSL, plus I think most of you are from the US, so it works out.

All sign language will be written in bold

Shoto Todoroki

Have you ever been snuck up on? Like, properly snuck up on? As in, you didn't even know they were there before they scared you? Scary, right? Now imagine...well, any situation where you've caught someone sneaking up on you. You heard them approaching you, and you look around to see them trying to scare you. You'd laugh it off and get about your day, right? Yeah...

Not me.

Have you ever bought anything? Like, gone into a shop and asked where something was? Told the cashier to keep the change? It's kinda neat, right? Now imagine trying to buy something without talking. Try having to count up the price of everything you buy because you won't be able to hear what the cashier asks for. You'd probably just write something down or point at something, right? I don't blame you, it's the easiest way sometimes, but not everyone gets it. You'd just open your mouth and explain your reasoning, right?

Not me.

Have you ever been on a date? As in, fancy restaurant, smart clothing...or the opposite even? A Maccies on your bed with your partner, perhaps? Fun, huh? Now try getting someone to go out with you without talking. Sure, if you're some supermodel it might work, or if some girl or guy likes a real edgelord, but the odds are slim, huh? So, who's been on a date then?

Not. Me.

Being deaf was hard, in case you didn't get the point. Things that other people don't even consider in their day to day lives were mountains for me to overcome. Can you imagine the terror of not being able to hear a tsunami siren? Not hearing the news about a meteor inbound? No, of course not. Because sound is such a simple thing, it's expected to be there. When a baby is born, the midwife smacks it to make sure it makes a noise. Sound is the first thing a human can identify, with foetuses being able to identify low frequency noises from within 8 weeks of their conception.

Not...me...

If being deaf was bad, being born deaf was insult to injury. It meant that I had no memory of sound. I couldn't remember what my mother's voice was like, because to me it simply didn't exist. It meant that I couldn't even fantasise about what her voice might be like, because I didn't know what any voices were like. Hell, my own voice was a mystery. That was the real kicker of being born a deaf person. I had no idea what I sounded like.

And I yearned to know. I wanted to know what my voice, mother's voice, any voice was like. I wanted to hear cars whizz by the house, wondered if they were as loud and annoying as Fuyumi said. How loud was loud? I wanted to hear music, put words and melody behind the vibrations I felt laying my phone on my chest. And possibly more than anything...I wanted to speak.

Speaking is something that I'd never done. While it has been said many times to me that deaf people can speak, I've always had to respond by signing "well not this one". Basically, my father had been pretty against the idea of teaching me to speak, basically saying it was a waste of time since all of us could sign. Mother had reluctantly agreed with him, and I was never taught. After father had died, mother put a little bit of effort into teaching me, but it came to no avail. Fuyumi and Natsuo had been good help as well, but even with the three of them, I hadn't managed a single word. Not knowing how to form the sounds of different letters of the alphabet was just too difficult a thing to overcome quickly, and mother's work didn't allow her the time to devote herself to teaching me, same for Fuyumi and Natsuo with work and college respectively.

Which unfortunately left me with very little. They'd mentioned to me about getting a carer/tutor in, but I'd declined that, not wanting any extra expenses spent on me. It was too much effort, after all. Learning to talk at age 18 just didn't seem possible for me, so I was stuck using my hands.

My previous schools had been pretty good at handling my deafness, putting subtitles on videos and teaching the class some basic sign language, and UA was no exception. Aizawa, my class professor, would always come right over to me after finishing his explanation, and explain the whole thing over again in sign. I liked him, he seemed like a nice person.

So anyway, I'm in class at the moment, staring out of the window absently. Watching the birds fly around with each other was fun, seeing the murmurations they made as they flocked. I knew there was probably something being told to the class at the moment, so I was free to just relax and wait for Aizawa. Sure enough, I felt a tap on my shoulder, flinching at the shock of it. Aizawa signed "I'm sorry. Can you make notes on pages 3-4, focus on the buildup to war for now"

"Yes, I'll do that"

"Thank you"

I didn't get the benefits of a lengthy chat with him, simply getting instructions and barely any more. After all, he (apparently) had a very rowdy class to deal with. I wanted to know what "rowdy" sounded like. I wanted to hear the green-haired boy's ramblings, wanted to hear the girls gossiping about their crushes, and wanted to hear the angry words of the agitated ash blond across the room...

...but nope. Silence encapsulated my life. It was a personality trait, really. Likes reading, dislikes being deaf. It never left me, constantly reminding me I was different. I couldn't drive on my own, couldn't phone someone without FaceTime, and couldn't even communicate with 90% of people

Nope...not me.
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Well, that's CH1 complete! I like this fic already.

Fact of the Day: the paragraph from the description was adapted and changed for this chapter, you'll probably see it a little bit above this.

Also gonna shamelessly plug here~

~Icy? Or Hot? (TDBK)

~SIX (TDBK)

~So Good (TDBK)

~Cry a little to be fine (TDBK)

~Studying You (TDBK)

~Higher Bid (TDBK)

~Popcorn (KuroKen)

~KNOCK, IDIOT!!! (KRBK)