From Afar | Winrina

20 | All The Things I Took

| Uchinaga Aeri 

"Aeri…I'm sorry."

The word came out of your mouth as if it was a bullet, piercing through my heart within just a second. 

"I love Minjeong. I love your best friend."

I know.

I already know. 

And that's the saddest part. 

I've always noticed. It wasn't that hard to realize. 

Because every time she comes around, your face always lights up as if seeing her makes your day complete. 

Every time we're together, your eyes are always trying to find her. 

Every time we're with our friends, your smiles are always because of her. 

I noticed. I've always been watching. 

But I was in denial. 

Maybe it was my fault. Thinking that you'd like me too because…I'm Aeri. People have always been admiring me and they always show it. Maybe that's what made me confident that you'd like me too. 

I was wrong. 

I knew that I was wrong from the start, but why did I push it?

Is it because I'm still hoping for a chance?

Is it because I'm still believing that I could do better?

Or is it because I know that I have the advantage because Minjeong keeps running away?

Yes. I know about it. 

'Minjeong is an open book that nobody bothers to read.' 

I remembered saying that before. 

Minjeong is very open. You can see the emotions she's feeling very clearly. She's mysterious but she's never hiding. She looks typical but she has always been interesting. Yet not all people see it. 

I know she has feelings for you. I can see it. No matter how much she lies, her eyes tell me otherwise.

But she keeps running away.

And I took advantage of it.

I was selfish. I couldn't accept the fact that you don't like me, so I became selfish.

And I'm still being selfish.

"Jimin…"

Just for this time. Give me one last time. 

"Can you pretend to like me? Just for one week, just for this vacation. Please be with me."

I'm sorry, Minjeong.

_

I ran.

As soon as I saw them in that room, hugging each other, lips almost kissing, I immediately ran.

I left the house. 

I haven't even worn any slippers. I am running barefoot but I don't care. 

I just ran and ran. 

While the tears are falling. 

While I feel pain in my heart. 

I shouldn't be.