Because I Had You

••EIGHT••

IMOGEN POV

UNEDITED
Dedicated to PamelaGramm

After that day Shawn and I split ways. Its been about a year and a half since that night. His managers changed his number and since instagram doesn't send people with a blue check mark notifications, we havent talked at all. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't sad. I stayed up crying a few nights. My "best friend" hasn't said anything to me since the night of the concert. I went back to school and work as if nothing happened.

Instead of doing homework I was scrolling on Instagram. I came across a post from Shawn, and my heart tore in half and my eyes burned with tears.
It was Shawn and Camila Cabello kissing in a pool. The caption states: 'I miss you princess'
That nickname, princess. He used to call me that when we were "together". I clicked on his profile and looked at more photos with him and her.
'I miss being around you.'
'If I could go back in time I would.'
Then there was a picture of Shawn holding a guitar pick.. it looked familiar. Then it clicked, that's the guitar pick I gave him after we pigged out on food. I read the caption and it said: 'Because I Had YOU'
Now, this could be a total coincidence. But my heart thought otherwise.
I tapped on the comment section and I began to type.
'When you're ready <3'
I pressed the 'post' button and I closed the app. I threw my head back onto my pillow and I closed my eyes.
I told myself not to get used to him, not to get attached. But what did I do? The opposite of that.
He looks happy though, I wonder how long they were talking.
I couldn't bring myself to date anyone. My heart needed time to heal. Same with my head, I can't get his smile, his voice, and the feeling of his skin out of my mind.
I felt my phone buzz beneath my blanket.
I pulled it out and I looked at the screen. It was an Instagram notification.
After unlocking the phone my heart was up in my throat.
'Shawn Mendes has sent you a message.'
Do I want to read it? Of course I do but I don't want to go through heart break again. We were only together for a little while. Imagine what would happen if it went on for longer?
I took a deep breath and opened the message.
Shawn: princess.. I miss you so much. I'm in town, meet me at the library on first and main at 9pm. I've talked to the owner and they gave me the keys. See you there princess.
I read the message over and over. Shawn is here? I looked over at the clock and it read eight forty five.
Before my brain had time to think about it. I was up and out of bed running around getting ready.
I settled on a pair of jeans, a pair of boots and a knit turtle neck long sleeve shirt. I managed to make my hair look nice. I left it down in its natural curls. I grabbed some matte lipstick and quickly put some on.
I grabbed my phone, purse and keys and ran out of the door.
I hopped into my old Chrysler 300, turned it on and threw it in drive. I had parked backwards in my driveway so I could drive off quickly if I needed to. And right now is a perfect example.

I pulled up into the library's parking lot. I put my car in park and turned it off. The was no other car in the parking lot. I check the time and it was nine fifteen. Traffic was terrible on the way over.
I was starting to think I missed him. But I got out of my car anyways and headed to the front.
I pulled on the doors and they were unlocked. I took a deep breathe in before I entered the building.
I love the library, it was dim lighted and it smelled of old books. It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. I turned around and locked the doors. If he wasn't in here then he'd had to text me to open them. I'm not taking any chances out here late at night.
"Shawn?" I called out. No answer from him. I'm assuming I either missed him or he wasn't here yet.
I'll give it a few minutes and then I'm leaving. I'm not going to chase after no man.
I began walking around the library picking up books and reading the backs of them.
After about five minutes I decided to leave.
"Well, I did this to myself. I got attached to someone even after I told myself not to."
As I was walking towards the door trying my best to keep the tears from falling I heard a voice.
"I think it's time that I be honest, princess."
I stopped dead in my tracks.
I turned around and looked for a body to connect the voice to.
Once my eyes landed on him I walked over to him ready to throw my arms around him.
Was I upset that he didn't try to contact me? Yes, but I also have a part to play in this.
His arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me in. I missed being in his arms.
"I missed you so much.." I whispered. He pulled me tighter into his arms. "I missed you too princess."
He planted a kiss on my hair and pulled away.
"Come, sit. I need to explain some stuff to you."
We walked over to a corner of the building were there are beanbags and stuff. We sat down and he began to explain himself.
"I shouldn't have let you go."

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